The Charge Of The Goose Brigade Poem by Bill Upton

The geese were waiting for me at the end of my run,
Patiently, hopefully waiting for me.
All gathered at their riverfront headquarters,
Pecking the frozen winter tundra in hopes of finding lunch-
At least 50 of them,
An army,
A starving army- like winged web footed soldiers at Valley Forge.
Starving, yet not surrendering.
A sadness overcame me for their hunger
So I drove home to retrieve a box of saltines.
Walking slowly toward them with cracker in hand,
I was met with suspicious opposition,
As they, one by one, retreated slowly back into the river.
They were refusing to risk capture even with the threat of loss,
Loss of their one link to eat this afternoon.
No risk takers stepped forward.
Collectively they formed an embargo against my advance.
Unanimously, they valued their safety more than their dinner.
After 15 minutes of my attempts to cater the affair,
I decided to simply leave the crackers and go home.
But then, out of nowhere,
As if cast from a John Wayne movie,
The biggest of the bunch made his move.
The boss goose, the leader of the pack, the main man
Stuck out his neck and began a Fonzie-like stroll toward me,
Letting the others know that the avian police commissioner had arrived.
There was no fear in his eyes, just purpose.
He came to survive for another day.
He came to feed his 'hood'.
It was ON.
Every goose was watching him make his stand.
He was Ali, defiantly taunting me with his boldness.
He bit hard on the cracker and also my finger for emphasis.
Without backing up an inch, he ate the whole thing right in front of me, right in what I thought was MY personal space!
When he finished, he turned to his audience and glared -
Evidently giving them their rite of passage to enter the cafeteria.
Marching like robots, every single goose came at me
With a renewed sense of bravery.
Every goose took a cracker right out of my hand (some including 'finger sandwiches') .
They had been validated by the general, the fearless general
Who was the trailblazer for the masses.
When the box was empty, they bull rushed me to try to find more,
Nipping at my hands and hindquarters when I started to run
To escape this surreal scene from 'THE BIRDS'.
The 'Charge of the Light Goose Brigade' had occurred.
Laughing hysterically, I found safety inside my car,
Having learned one of the important lessons-
When you need results,
Even with geese,
You go after the leader first.