Clint Tilley


The Girl


Eyes so deep, like an abyss. Heart so dark, she's so sad. If she could have somethin'. It'd just be a kiss. Ever since that day, Her life has been changed. She never says anything. Why, we can't say. Her tears are all dried, She never cries. She wants to end her life, But she has never tried. Everyone loves her, but can't say a thing. Nobody even spares a small 'Hi! ' So I guess it's up to me. She wanders the halls, books held close. I step in front of her and lean in. Just a peck on the lips, made her smile. Tears begin to fall as I hold her close. She whispers to me 'Thank you.' Her life is complete...as she holds me tight...

Submitted: Sunday, March 02, 2008

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  • Lime and Tequila with a Splash of Pineapple (3/2/2008 11:29:00 PM)

    You have a powerful story, a good heartfelt message here. In particular, the center of this piece is dynamite.

    It would read stronger if you broke it up a bit, made it easier to read. And I'd like to seem some of your images polished a bit, because your story is so good, it deserves your best work.

    I'm glad I had a chance to read this. You have an emotional ear; it just needs to be developed a bit.

    Peace,

    L&T (Report) Reply

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