The Lost Peice Of My Heart Poem by Deja Noelle Rupp

what I fear
could be real
it rips me apart inside
to think that something that special
could be taken away from me in just one night
Did I give in or did I say no
these questions trouble my mind
they eat away my flesh and put pressure on my brain
leaving me feeling so empty I could die
I feel so useless i feel so cheap
I feel so tricked i feel so sleazy
haunting memories
I just cant quite grasp
out of my reach
I collapse
whats the point in living
if you cant remember the things
that make you who you are
that made me who I am today
my mind strives to remember
yet my soul burys it deeper
afraid of what i might find
possibly afraid of retrieving
those dark and painful memories
I have inside of my head
i can remember the beginning
i just cant remember the end
respect for myself
I've thrown away
I used to like myself
that was yesterday
things have happened so damn fast
I sicken myself
when I think of my past
I guess I did this to myself
I'll continue to have my heart ripped away
piece by piece day by day
until I find out what happened to me
to the girl I used to be
the one who never would of been in this kind of position
of waking up sore
with scratch marks all over her door
and though I don't seem upset I push my emotions away
I cry myself to sleep almost every day
maybe one day I'll find the lost piece of my heart
but whoever stole it
I want to tear them apart