I was a loyal postal clerk, now 'happily' retired,
and my duty to the Postal Service is now expired.
But the USPS is not soooo bad as some have said.
They may be 'slug'gish, but they aren't (YET) dead!
Now I've heard disguised-grousing from K. Kurt,
and, as an ex-postal worker, let me say 'I'm HURT! '
So, if ANY of you readers think you could do better,
grab a bag of mail, and deliver this newsy letter:
'Dear disgruntled customers of the Postal Service,
Don't think that threats of a class action suit will unnerve us!
If you ever DO win some case against us, and we doubt you will,
here is what we'd offer you to 'In Full' pay our judgment bill:
Each participant of any such ridiculous class action lawsuit,
will receive from the USPS five postcards and five stamps to boot!
Each stamp will be clearly marked that they are stamps-'NEVER'.
[yeah, some of our legal staff in D.C. sure is very clever! ]
You may use each card, and on each card you may place a NEVER stamp.
Drop it in a collection box or slot, and then away home you can tramp.
We'll do the rest for you and your free stamps. And we'll be 'even'.
We'll NEVER deliver your five cards! ! NOW, let's have no more legal grievin'! ! '
Sincerely,
Bri Edwards
Postmaster General, Washington D.C.
(December 18, 2015)
The lawsuit doesn't look like a fair fight but I do not think I would argue with you. Humour for sure! Thank You Bri Hope the eye ball is recovering well.
I still say that there is nothing quite like getting a hand written letter in the mailbox.: -)
It is always great to feel proud to acknowledge the profession one has been in and to have continued loyalty to the Dept. one has associated with. Enjoyed this poem in your characteristic humorous vein!
Brian Mayo... Kim Barney ... Kelly Kurt ... Bri Edwards , , I have a question for the four of you... WHICH ONE OF YOU IS D'ARTAGNAN! !
And who'd be pictured on the never stamp, I wonder? George W. Bush gets my vote..
Think it's gotta be Trump, but I'll let it slide because in December 15 when you made the comment everybody just thought he was a tiny fingered, racist, pathetic human being.... Now they think he's a tiny fingered, racist, pathetic monster with a nomination #nevertrump
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
In the city where I live some love letters and other mail was discovered after 19 years in a bank type drop box of a closed down store (this week) .