Flying Lemming

You’re not quite the height I like but I can bend a bit
You’re wider than the girls I like but I guess you could get fit
You hair is kind of mousey, not the shiny blond I seek
Your voice isn’t velvety and your laugh has that odd squeak
Your eyes are brown and I like green, and one is slightly higher
You don’t have the slender cheekboned face that I tend to desire
Your figure doesn’t have many curves, just one on either side
Not quite petite, more filled out, did I mention you were wide?
You’re a bit refined for my taste, I like them loud and brash
And I must just add if you want me you’ll have to shave that ‘tash
Your hairy lip just makes me cringe, as does your taste in clothes
I mean how did you ever think you’d look good in those
But as I have no other options I’ll give you a try
Most girls don’t seem to want me, I can’t imagine why