Renu Rakheja a.k.a Tranquil Ocean


This Is Our World! ! (Shocking N Explicit) - Poem by Renu Rakheja a.k.a Tranquil Ocean

Where a child lives in a warm mother's cocoon
Where a child is sold to the prostitutes, her life doomed
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Comments about This Is Our World! ! (Shocking N Explicit) by Renu Rakheja a.k.a Tranquil Ocean

  • Rookie Ashley Mejia (7/30/2009 7:08:00 PM)

    wow this poem forces the reader to realize that this is in fact our world. this is a an eye-opening poem, good job: ] (Report) Reply

    1 person liked.
    2 person did not like.
  • Rookie David Dennis (2/16/2007 3:34:00 AM)

    Is this true? .... It can't be surely....God to think that I make jokes about paedophilia... Do chimpanzees do this I wonder? Anyway to the critique: Striking polemic here. The couplets showing polemical dichotomy between first and second lines is simple and effective, however this dichotomy should be more obvious in the first stanza. Forced rhyme in the fourth stanza kills it for me. It doesn't have a finish. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 3 Points Original Unknown Girl (2/12/2007 4:49:00 AM)

    Gosh TO, a most sobering read, a very real problem and you wrote about this with good grace. What a shocking and dreadful place these young children are in, I do hope some of them get rescued into a 'normal' world, where love of a child means exactly that; pure and simple. Good if somewhat harrowing write. HG: -) xx (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Andrew mark Wilkinson (2/12/2007 3:59:00 AM)

    What a sad world we live in, we say look how far we have come... but yet here we are doing what the romans where doing two thousand years later... where is Civilisation...? great writing tranquil makes you think... (Report) Reply

  • Rookie dhainee pfafflin (2/12/2007 3:44:00 AM)

    wow... truly... but not all children live in a mother's warm cocoon... and not all children has fathers, : (a very sad fact... indeed (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 0 Points Raghavan Warrier (2/4/2007 12:14:00 PM)

    When a poem is based on facts hard to deny, it makes me sad. Very well written. (Report) Reply

  • Gold Star - 39,704 Points Frank James Ryan Jr...fjr (2/2/2007 3:55:00 PM)

    Both gripping & rivoting work here, T.O.....AS dUNCAN ALLUDED TO ALREADY...THE FACT THAT ALL YOUR RESEARCH IS BASED ON ACTUALS....LEAVES ME UNCHARACTERISTICALLY HESITANT IN
    EXERCISINF MY USUAL STYLED CRITIQUE...MAKE NO MISTAKE, THOUGH, MY FRIEND...THIS IS A VERY SOLID PIECE OF
    CRAFTING...HANDS DOWN...
    FJR (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Duncan Wyllie (2/2/2007 2:05:00 PM)

    This is just too sad to make coment on..it leaves me so sad..numb of mind..crying inside
    You are so profound here,
    Love duncan X (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 46 Points Linda Ori (2/2/2007 9:46:00 AM)

    Pretty graphic and powerful piece, here, T O. You open our eyes to the horrors of a supposedly advanced society. Doesn't say much for the intellectual and moral growth mankind, does it?
    Linda (Report) Reply

  • Rookie - 231 Points Ronald Stroman (2/2/2007 8:55:00 AM)

    friendly faces with unfriendly hands. (Report) Reply

  • Rookie Francesca Johnson (2/2/2007 6:11:00 AM)

    Indeed shocking and extremely traumatising to think of all those little children losing what should be happy childhoods. My heart breaks. Thank you, TO, for bringing this out into the open. The statistics are horrifying but I suspect they are even greater than those quoted.

    Love, Fran xxx (Report) Reply










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