Jax Ann Newton

To My Love and My Worst Enemy

Whole things stay unbroken,
Holes don’t mend themselves,
If you leave them attended
Up on lofty shelves.

The clock on the wall keeps ticking,
As the sky high above turns grey.
Thus is a typical ending
To a very atypical day.

It starts with the things unseen,
A broken heart, a tear held back.
Then moves on to the obvious,
Things, charred and black.

Broken bones heal rather quickly,
Unlike a broken heart.
But for you to understand
I must explain it from the start.

I woke with a start at the thought of your name,
Love throbbing through my veins.
I rushed with anticipation swelling,
But I was left standing in the rain.

I stood there waiting, hoping,
You would see me standing there.
But instead I watched you run to her,
My best friend, I could only stare.

I thought maybe you’d come back for me
As I watched you walk inside.
But then I realized all my pondering
Had taken too much time.

I held back the tears, I masked all the pain.
Only what I allowed was shown.
Pushed forward we you and all your games.
I went through life alone.

Nobody was told of the pain I went through
Because I didn’t know how much I loved you until you weren’t mine.
I taunted and teased, but inside I wasn’t pleased
With how the situation was handled when you weren’t mine.

But now it’s too late.
I refuse to live in the past.
That is what we are. I refuse to let you win.
We didn’t and wont last.

To what is just to say at all how death is not real.
When most of life is dying, almost all we feel.
And to believe and understand, loss comes from whom you love.
The only comfort I have is you hate me, you hinted, I shoved.

Submitted: Monday, January 05, 2009
Edited: Sunday, August 23, 2009

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