Umlaut Me Poem by Lonnie Hicks

Punctuation and I have regular altercations,
see what I mean that comma looks like it is following me
its on the down low
allied with 'quote'
her two friends which float
in the sky like twin drones
encapsulating
I may mount twin hash tags ##
calling forth my posse
but I am again forestalled
by beady-eyed (brackets)
which interrupt my flow
my writing starts to look like
chopped up spaghetti
rebellious I post
in revenge alternative spellings
irreverent capitalizations
wily vague concepts
as punctuation stands mute
knickers twisting
confused
unable to ply her autocratic wares
I in the grip of Love's Poem
can barely hide my gloat
underneath my 'Love Kiss'
as punctuation glowers jealously
I steal away mind you
to the next line
continuing anew
with a delicious
run-on sentence
letting my participles dangle
I stare at her
placing some mistletoe
on all my gerunds
watching 'P' that's what I call her
tie herself in tangles
as I misstate
my facts and clauses
abandon her
to Webster's Hands
while I sit fondling
my Funk and Wagnall's.

Drag me down if you must
to Hells Low Punctuation Retreats
But Satan will Desist
Citing that Restraining Order
he has against me.
OP cit. if you must
call me Mr. Ibid
coddle I will
my bibliography
hand to my breast
and coo
'Oh my Miss "P"
did your self-love affair
end
with you
breaking up with you?
Here sit beside me won't you
my Ulaut
has plenty of room.'