Uphill Fear Poem by Ben Duncan

Some days are harder than others
some moments worse
smile and lie to most of the world
say it's nothing to worry about to the rest
Forcing the way through every painful moment,
knowing only another one awaits you

you used to say i'll always be fine
I'll always be happy
now you can't even remember what it feels like
you know things are going downhill
you don't know how to stop it
you don't know if you want to stop it
afraid of what it might be like going uphill
so you do nothing

looking ahead everything seems bland
it feels painful looking any farther than a day
you only look forward to unconsciousness
during the waking moments you flip the channels,
the pages
you read and hear words so full of joy and hope
talking of a brighter day, a happier hour
you hear your friends smile and laugh and say 'be happy'
you only feel worse
you sit down
you endlessly wait
Because that's all you can do