'War'? Poem by Ryan Joseph Holder

I long for the flesh
Yet I speak from the mind
I simply want someone
To help me unwind
I want to feel
The insides of a stranger
Or maybe I like
The feeling of danger
I love that it's sick
I love that it's wrong
I love hating the feeling
You get when it's done
I love feeling the pleasure
And feeling the guilt
I love hearing the silence
Like time has stood still
I love the decision we make
And taking the blame
How someone always
Hangs their head in shame...
...But I hate that ugly feeling
You get but never show
A feeling of self-hatred
The feeling of being alone!