Michael McParland (7-19-1983 / Dayton, Ohio)
Why Am I.........?
Why am I such a worthless fool,
in everything I feel think and attempt to do?
I'm so stupid that no matter my best intentions I'll just hurt you both of us feeling the repercussions.
Why am I such a hideous monster that can only seem to destroy.
Only wanting to show you my love but somehow in my endless confusion end up pushing you away.
I just want to open my soul to you and let you help me all the way through.
My suffering and pain my sick spinning twisted brain.
And return to you all the love and goodness you've shown and diligently upon me grew.
Why can't I ever seem to get the motions right,
of properly treating and showing you that you are my angel and my sole light.
I am such a disgusting fool because no matter what I do I always end up failing and abandoning you.
I want so badly to show you my all in my heart and soul,
let you and only you know me to the core through and through.
However my ego and inner self are pathetically fragile easily wounded so I step back and cower with self preservation and defenses that tower.
Why am I such a terrible mix of a man and monster?
In the end I guess you should call me a manster.
I just want you to love me and show you that to my angel I'm true.
Please forgive me my love I just want to give my whole life only you,
my heart my soul my entire being because you are the one a true divine being.
Please be gentle with my heart my sweet sweet love because I can't handle to feel what it's like to be broken by such a pure and holy love from above.
Please don't hate me for the manster I am.
I love you so much I truly do for you the best that I can.
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