Yellow Daisies Poem by Theresa Haffner

i hate flowers

more precisely, i hate the feeling
that thinking flowers are beautiful engenders

that kind of vulnerability
that i have come to see as weakness

that i despise as

i also hate love songs
as something overly sentimental, outright corny or
in bad taste

the kind of feeling in a relationship
that makes you feel like a fourteen year old girl

alright for fourteen year old girls but not for adults
who have too much dignity
who have been hurt too much already

i
hate
love

not because i don’t love you

not because i haven’t
felt the pangs of love’s
blood red intensity

but because of the abusive love relationships
that strip us of our dignity
rob us of our freedom
and make slaves out of us to one another

rob us of our sensibilities
as surely as any intoxicating substance
as dependence forming as any drug addiction

better our pain than our innocence

mine instead the
scream of the inner city
the cry of the desolate pavement at night
the cracked cement
the
broken glass

mine the cry of desperation

and violent loneliness
where human beings like stunted flowers
grow to a weird distorted blossom

better my pain
than to be caught one more time
in foolishness

where love hurts