Your Messages To Me Are Mixed Poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar

Let's pretend...
That during the many years,
I spent going through personal agonies...
You and your selected crew,
Made a decision to do to me...
What I wouldn't think of doing to you.
And you had no idea,
Most of those years I sat alone...
Doing the best I could not to let that known.

And let's pretend,
Today your misdeeds you have recognized.
And my healing done with much sacrifice,
Has achieved a peace you neither undestand,
But you have shown to me a dislike.
What do you think that I should do?
Pretending the way we are...
That what was done to me by you,
You assumed I never knew.

'But...
I no longer pretend,
I have come to you to be forgiven.
Things have changed.
I know I have.'

I too have changed.
And there is something about pretending,
I have found best not to do myself.

'So...
What is it that your are saying? '

Difficult it is for me to reminisce.
And not forget who inflicted painful memories.

'Why do you smile?
Your messages to me are mixed.'

I've learned to smile.
That has nothing to do with the message.
You will soon comprehend.
Trust me.