“It was true that I didn’t have much ambition, but there ought to be a place for people without ambition, I mean a better place than the one usually reserved. How in the hell could a man enjoy being awakened at 6:30 a.m. by an alarm clock, leap out of bed, dress, force-feed, shit, piss, brush teeth and hair, and fight traffic to get to a place where essentially you made lots of money for somebody else and were asked to be grateful for the opportunity to do so?”
' It makes your hair stand on end when you reflect on how much time and exertion has been wasted on the brilliancy of the Bible...And what...will have been gained from these ‘Facts'? Certainly nothing more than the knowledge that, like all books, the Bible was a book written by men...The more an elucidation shines upon the Bible the more it contains ordinary proofs...'
If they [Mexicans] touch the hair of the head of one of our citizens, tell him [Commodore Dallas] to batter down and destroy their town and exterminate the inhabitants from the face of the earth!
(Andrew Jackson (1767-1845), U.S. president. Attorney General Benjamin Butler to his wife Harriet, June 29, 1836.
Related by Attorney General Benjamin Butler to his wife when Jackson heard that Mexican authorities had inflicted "indignities" on the American consul and residents of Tampico.)
To tell you the truth, I'm relieved that the Van Ripers are not coming. He's telling the same jokes he told twenty years ago and she dyes her hair. I think it's a shrimp pink now.
(Adele Comandini, and Edward Sutherland. Michael O'Brien (Charles Winninger), Beyond Tomorrow, when the three partners are stood up for a dinner engagement (1940).
Original story by Mildred Cram and Adele Comandini.)
I am pretty sure that, if you will be quite honest, you will admit that a good rousing sneeze, one that tears open your collar and throws your hair into your eyes, is really one of life's sensational pleasures.
(Robert Benchley (1889-1945), U.S. writer, humorist. No Poems or Around the World Backwards and Sideways, "Hiccoughing Makes Us Fat," Harper & Brothers (1932).)
West Germans are tall, pert and orthodontically corrected, with hands, teeth and hair as clean as their clothes and clothes as sharp as their looks. Except for the fact that they all speak English pretty well, they're indistinguishable from Americans.
(P.J. (Patrick Jake) O'Rourke (b. 1947), U.S. journalist. repr. In Give War a Chance (1992). "The Death of Communism," Rolling Stone (Nov. 1989).)
I believe in the total depravity of inanimate things ... the elusiveness of soap, the knottiness of strings, the transitory nature of buttons, the inclination of suspenders to twist and of hooks to forsake their lawful eyes, and cleave only unto the hairs of their hapless owner's head.
(Katharine Walker (1840-1916), U.S. author. Atlantic Monthly (Boston, Sept. 1864).)