Bryony Sheldon

Gold Star - 6,757 Points (13/09/2003)

Biography of Bryony Sheldon

[Female,15, UK]
I like thrash metal, fast cars and ultraviolence.

Poetic inspirations for Bryony Sheldon:
J.G. Thirlwell
Dr John Cooper Clarke
Simon Armitage
Neil Fallon
Phil Lynott
Bon Scott
James Hetfield
Dave Mustaine
Peter Sinfield
Geezer Butler
Ronnie James Dio

Biggest achievements of Bryony Sheldon:
-Watched The Green Mile without crying.
-Stood up so fast that she temporarily could see into the fourth dimension.
-Managed to boil minute rice in 56 seconds.
-Snook into an 18 rated film (When 13)
-Was smuggled into a Motörhead concert at the age of 5. Eardrums were permanently damaged, thus leading to parents' divorce.

Bryony Sheldon's Works:

An Expert's Guide To Rope Bondage

101 Ways To Start A Fire With A Bucket Of Water

Perfect Alibis For Getting Away With Murder

Optimism Drowns In A Half-Full Tub Updates


I stand there, helpless,
Watching, useless.
All I can contribute is a scream
Lamenting the horrific scene.

Your neck snaps, skin melts,
Collarbone breaks on the seatbelt.
Your skull smashes against the wheel;
Bone fragments through the windshield.

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