Fran Lebowitz

(1950 / Morristown, New Jersey)

Fran Lebowitz Quotes

  • ''Remember that as a teenager you are at the last stage in your life when you will be happy to hear that the phone is for you.''
    Fran Lebowitz (b. 1951), U.S. journalist. "Tips for Teens," Social Studies (1981).
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  • ''Stand firm in your refusal to remain conscious during algebra. In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra.''
    Fran Lebowitz (b. 1951), U.S. journalist. "Tips for Teens," Social Studies (1981).
  • ''I never met anyone who didn't have a very smart child. What happens to these children, you wonder, when they reach adulthood?''
    Fran Lebowitz (20th century), U.S. author. "Words Are Easy, Books Are Not," The New York Times (August 10, 1994).
  • ''If you're going to America, bring your own food.''
    Fran Lebowitz (b. 1951), U.S. journalist. "Fran Lebowitz's Travel Hints," Social Studies (1981).
  • ''There are two modes of transport in Los Angeles: car and ambulance. Visitors who wish to remain inconspicuous are advised to choose the latter''
    Fran Lebowitz (b. 1951), U.S. journalist. "Lesson 1," Social Studies (1981).
  • ''If you are of the opinion that the contemplation of suicide is sufficient evidence of a poetic nature, do not forget that actions speak louder than words.''
    Fran Lebowitz (b. 1951), U.S. journalist. "Letters," Metropolitan Life (1978).
  • ''There is no such thing as inner peace. There is only nervousness or death. Any attempt to prove otherwise constitutes unacceptable behavior.''
    Fran Lebowitz (b. 1951), U.S. journalist. "Manners," Metropolitan Life (1978).

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