I created this in hope of finding my birth siblings Paula Moore, James Pilgrim, Bobby Ray Pilgrim and the other one is unknown to me. I am the daughter of the (deceased) Kenneth Anderson Black Pilgrim and Barbara Bell Franklin and also for people to know or also compared to my feelings in my poem and related to it or just know nobody in the world has a perfect life. I've always wanted to be happy and loved for as long as I could remember because I've been sexual, physical and mental abused for as long as I can remember all the way to age 15 and I was about to turn 16 in four months and then I finally build up enough courage to figured out a plan on how to get to someone who could help me and get me out of there and I finally left my old abusive adopted family home and now I'm in a level 2 group home and about to turn 17 on march 1 and the owner's are trying to find somewhere or someone to level me down to because I might never get have someone that would want to adopt me because it is rare for a good family to want to adopt a teenager because usually most good families usually want to adopt little kids, but they said it's rare that teenagers adopt to a good family or any family at that. So, I'm at a level 2 group home called 'Peace In the City' waiting to age out so I can get into the 18 to 21 program that helps 18 year olds get apartments, jobs and a car because they said that's my only option because no one wants a teenager. I'm am no longer single and is now finding out what real love is with my Boyfriend Alex. I love him more than anyone could love anyone. I love him more than life itself. My favorite hobby is to read & write poems, read a lot of books, play the guitar, listen to music, draw art, be outside with nature and be around animals. My favorite flower is a red rose, my favorite colors are purple, blue and black, and strangle i have a favorite number which is 4. My favorite genres to read romance books and history wise is mythology books. I am now single because of the fate of the person that made feel like I found the 1 person who able 2 fix me and I let my frozen heart melt and trusted him with it and instead of hurting me and causing my heart 2 go back frozen again he ripped it out, so now I'm broken, empty, cold inside and died inside, now, but the thing is I still love and I would right into his arms if he open them and stand up facing me saying baby, do U still want me? I would right into his arms without second guessing it.
Looking & searching for true love,
Painfully Failing twice,
Finally, I gave up, tired of feeling hurt like after a fall from a painful shove,
Finally, I called a truce.
Oh Alex, why? ,
Why cause me this terrible pain? ,
Oh Alex, now my thoughts are full of nothing but ways that I can die,
What happiness and pleasure out of this did you gain? .
I found a new love today,
And started a new beginning today,
But I still feel that same terrible strong fear everyday,
Why does life make people feel this way.
Oh my love,
Oh my love, where have you wander to?
Oh my love, are you hurt or in sorrow, please tell worry has wrapped itself around me like a tight glove, Oh my love, a day without you is like a day without oxygen, please let me see or hear from you.
Oh my love, oh how I miss you,