surya surya

Rookie - 77 Points (dec -1948. / kozhikode, @chennai.india)

A Lesson In Swimming*. - Poem by surya surya

(*when a young girl ventures out for her
first class in swimming she should briefed
on consequence of body baring as well
........................
........................
read full text »

Topic(s) of this poem: safety


Comments about A Lesson In Swimming*. by surya surya

  • Vipins Puthooran (11/6/2011 3:03:00 AM)

    Wow, , , it's an amazing write and a great poem, , , wonderful emotions so real it's...
    Top marks! ! !
    (Report)Reply

    1 person liked.
    2 person did not like.
  • Mark Nwagwu (4/13/2010 2:32:00 PM)

    unpleasant experience; spoils the purity of swimminmg water - that bathes the body, lifts the heart to see the sky.. and maybe even dream. Swimming is more than just moving in water and splashing around, it is an elixir purifying our blocked sensations. The crude coach does not understand this...though (Report)Reply

    1 person liked.
    0 person did not like.
  • Mehta Hasmukh Amathalal (4/4/2010 10:44:00 PM)

    suddenly it seemed water is hot and
    boiling, quickly they moved to change
    room, where he bared her nude, it
    was her curiosity and his anxiety! .. it is transmission pure ly arrival of spring in her body and eqquall response.. lovelytgheme....10

    read mine... i miss... miss i miss u
    (Report)Reply

    2 person liked.
    1 person did not like.
  • (3/30/2010 1:44:00 AM)

    NOTE OF CONCERN:
    This poem is vilevoguish mindset of swimming teachers…and Sr. Poet Surya Sir explicitly narrated and expressed the agony and insult to femininity…what may stay stored in subconscious …and many give many psychical problems …later on…very much concerning…and poets are looking glass of society and reflect the blacks and whites as they’re …here ably done by poet..

    In this poem often unnoticed area poet has reflected…be safe the parents and learners…, my humble concern echo with the poet
    Ms. Nivedita
    UK
    (Report)Reply

    0 person liked.
    0 person did not like.
  • (3/28/2010 2:55:00 PM)

    Ghastly! ! Grisly! ! ! Gruesome! ! ! !

    Macabre? ? ? ? WHY WHY WHY? ?
    10+++
    Ms. Nivedita
    UK
    (Report)Reply

    0 person liked.
    0 person did not like.
  • (12/26/2009 1:04:00 AM)

    If you're going to swim - swim. If you'r going to shop - then shop. If you're going to work - work. Don't lose your focus in life because bad things can happen. Good moral. (Report)Reply

    0 person liked.
    0 person did not like.
  • (10/31/2009 4:59:00 AM)

    powerful and in the beginning you don't really suspect then ending until the second stanza, great write! (Report)Reply

    1 person liked.
    1 person did not like.
  • Adi Cox (10/1/2009 8:25:00 AM)

    I was drawn into the poem and the seduction of a beautiful young girl. This is what dreams are made of. What makes this poem good is that it highlights an abuse of power: The coach that takes advantage of their students. This poem appeals to the most basic instinct of being male and shows just how easy it is to slip into bad ways. Excellent poem.10/10. (Report)Reply

    1 person liked.
    1 person did not like.
  • (9/27/2009 7:51:00 PM)

    How easily can the line between graceful admiration and lust be crossed. Your first verse promises a lyrical descriptive piece. Your second is short and hot and unexpected! A slice of life shared with no holes bared. Love, Allie ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ (Report)Reply

    1 person liked.
    1 person did not like.
  • (9/27/2009 8:55:00 AM)

    a lesson in swimming? did I miss something? ;) hope she learned something though...whether bad or good.... (Report)Reply

    1 person liked.
    1 person did not like.
  • (9/26/2009 3:18:00 AM)

    Happens all the time..................
    Good try.........
    (Report)Reply

    1 person liked.
    1 person did not like.
  • (9/22/2009 9:41:00 AM)

    The first stanza was well done although the second stanza lacked the subtlety
    that could have made tis poem great instead of merely quite good.
    (Report)Reply

    1 person liked.
    1 person did not like.
  • (9/22/2009 1:46:00 AM)

    what a guts.....its suspense to some and surprise to other....its
    a bird flying knowing that it has feathers, as the fish looks so
    fantastic....

    wow! both has experience in different way yet! unbelievable
    to say....as it grow tells, us the truth that life is an awesome to see
    beautiful poem with a point to tell...Thank you my friend.....
    God bless a 10 +++
    (Report)Reply

    1 person liked.
    1 person did not like.
  • Cat Tiger (9/21/2009 10:58:00 AM)

    Not a poem but an exercise in eliciting response. Shame. (Report)Reply

    1 person liked.
    1 person did not like.
  • (9/18/2009 2:19:00 PM)

    I've rated it 9 for the beautiful 1st stanza. The 2nd stanza however falls short of the mark, its unsubtle and the word Anxiety doesn't convey what you probably wanted to convey. (Report)Reply

    1 person liked.
    1 person did not like.
  • (9/18/2009 10:04:00 AM)

    I can't make an honest comment, about this poem. It's supposed to be a lesson in swimming, but it appears to be, a lesson in lust! The two, just don't go, together. (Report)Reply

    1 person liked.
    1 person did not like.
  • (9/18/2009 9:39:00 AM)

    Your poem is a bit of a puzzle but here are my comment:

    'A lesson in Swimming' seems to be a lesson of a young girl coming of age in the water of innocence- instead of curiosity- with a swimming teacher who knows the lesson well.This is the lesson I got from your poem. Moves from the hot waters to another room?
    (Report)Reply

    1 person liked.
    1 person did not like.
  • (9/18/2009 5:26:00 AM)

    A good one in its content and in style, well.... a bit prosaic. (Report)Reply

    1 person liked.
    1 person did not like.
  • Arjun Singh (9/18/2009 4:29:00 AM)

    a gud one well try buddy.....bt somthing is missing.....i m also confused wat is missing.....bt overall......gud wrk (Report)Reply

    1 person liked.
    1 person did not like.
  • (9/17/2009 6:52:00 AM)

    Fave line: 'suddenly it seemed water is hot and boiling' (Report)Reply

    1 person liked.
    1 person did not like.









Famous Poems

  1. Still I Rise
    Maya Angelou
  2. The Road Not Taken
    Robert Frost
  3. If You Forget Me
    Pablo Neruda
  4. Dreams
    Langston Hughes
  5. Annabel Lee
    Edgar Allan Poe
  6. If
    Rudyard Kipling
  7. Stopping By Woods On A Snowy Evening
    Robert Frost
  8. Do Not Stand At My Grave And Weep
    Mary Elizabeth Frye
  9. I Do Not Love You Except Because I Love You
    Pablo Neruda
  10. Television
    Roald Dahl
[Report Error]