NeniaArnaiz Dulom


Decluttering - Poem by NeniaArnaiz Dulom

My room is too crowded with unnecessary things,
Making my space all choked-up and tense,
Once you estimate what makes it so filled,
You’ll realize they are just subjects of thrill;

Three dimensional objects I cannot part myself with,
Even if they occupied the whole of my universe,
Even if they’ve collected dust and grime for decades,
And spiders settled serenely in their midst;

Though they make my head ache seeing them always,
Or my heart painfully palpitate by reminiscing the events,
I just cannot ignore the emotion that goes with each,
Even if it means living in tight place;

Oh sentimental tokens, family mementos and ancestral heirlooms,
Too hard to come to terms to get rid of their emotional values,
I grapple with the guilt of disposing them to the hands of others,
It’s unthinkable to consider throwing out such cherished possessions;

Forgotten cards, notes and love letters,
Of unspoken feelings from sweetheart and friends,
All but sweet nothings, tagged with memories and moments,
My instinct to store them never failed in years;

Where are those authors who lured me with their words?
Now they are simply gone, yet remained in my thoughts,
My head’s depository is just an extension to merit and exploit,
But the physical storage is the one that should get credit and tribute;

Here’s a frame of first boyfriend who charmed me with his beams,
An infidel who ran away with my very best friend,
Yes lo to me, I was cheated so cruel,
It was finally removed from its proud pedestal;

Old photos with playmates and early days’ chums,
I treasured once in my child heart like my precious gems,
We did not want to lose those moments so we captured everything,
Now they are stack of fading images in tarnished joyful evidence;

There you are my childhood pal I think your time is up,
I am now a grown-up who do not need a cuddly stuff,
It is heartbreaking to take you away from my arms,
But that’s how a life goes it has to end sometimes;

Tons of papers, notebooks and collection of empty ballpoint,
Littering my drawer, my desk, and my full cartons,
My kiddy artworks, every scribble my mom found good,
Why are you staying longer than your actual use?
Don’t you have any other purpose than linger and rot?

My toys turned vintage, and trophies of every achievement,
To add up to miscellany of knick-knacks and medley of old cassettes,
Anthology of children books, teenage paperbacks and glossy magazines,
I appreciate all your help when you enriched my youthful awareness,
When you defined my character, my fashion style and sense;

Now I know when clothes is either lousy and loose,
Or too fit or amorphous to choose,
And it does not only go with the wearables,
Like choosing jewelry, belts and shoes,
It is also useful in grooming, interacting, or sharpening my tools;

Speaking of it, I see that I amass loads of outfits that are now unfit,
Outmoded or outdated, or ridiculously archaic,
We spent some good times together, I admit,
But it’s time to go out of my over stuffed closet,
You must be off away from my sight too chaotic;

Old boxes of sneakers, colorful flip-flops without lace,
First semi-high-heeled shoes for teens I wore when I was twelve,
All unforgotten first times when I strutted with craze,
Which my heart seems unwilling to separate,
I wish I could re-live that period when first time is at best;

To walk a walk of life in a pair of dearly girly shoes or sleepers,
All these and more I find unwelcome anymore,
They dwell inside my storage space, stock up and so full,
Some inhabit my shelve and others settle under my bed,
Waiting to be discarded, a decision I never did;

But now that I need to declutter not only my closet and space,
But most of all my heart and mind which are now overwhelmed by my mess,
I hope it is easy to just throw away things,
When memory is filled with so many special events,
A lifetime of experience to behold and cherish;

They say it is better to attach the emotion to memories than items,
That there are ways to realistically and wisely deal with life’s clutters,
And now is always the right time to initiate the feat,
To purge the stuff and just ignore a guilty conscience;

I know I can always give up my beloved possessions to anybody,
Like someone elses’ child may find pleasure in a second-hand toy,
Or old clothes that no longer please me may still bring abundant joy,
Especially to folks who are really in need and deprived of those;

All in good form and shape can always find pairs of appreciative hands,
I only need to use my unwanted and useless things to gain new experience,
I won’t wait for them to overtake every inch of me that is willing to compromise,
I’ll suck them out at once from slumbering longer than enough;

Emotional obstructions can be wearing and exasperating to get down to it,
But it would be rewarding when I see my place tidy and neat,
The bottom line is, start putting one’s mind and heart in order first,
Removing all unnecessary clutter, limiting beliefs and confusions that restrict;

Like history of pain, disappointments, anger and fears,
Or any inhabitation of negative emotions and feelings that never retreat,
To ably do the other disposing and decluttering of external hurdles,
I need to free myself from inner and outer junks that block my pace;

I must accept the fact that they cannot live with me forever,
If I want growth and progress to sweep over,
There’s nothing to do than to remember,
I always have the memory without consigning loads further
Decluttering is simply an amalgamation of determination and war to wage from within.

(May 18,2011 Philippines)


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Poem Submitted: Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Poem Edited: Thursday, May 19, 2011


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