Rookie (3.22.995 / honolulu, hawaii)

I Try So Hard - Poem by CHARELL TAYLOR

Its so much i wish i could do to make everbody feel loved.
but i really dont have much too offer.
i try to be the most understanding but i guess im not trying hard enough.
its so much i wish i could do to make everybody feel comfterble. but i guess im not wishing hard enough!
its so much i wish i could offer him.
but the thing is im just too young.. i try my hardest to be there.. but i guess its not hard enough..
life is a bitch but life is something i live!
nothing more can explain how i feel about you.
but theres nothing more i feel like i can do. i try my hardest to listen to what youre saying but everytime i hear a word its like i wish it was my place. i feel like i have no choice but to be the one that gets hurt in the end.
I feel as if im trying my best to push myself to do better.
but i guess im not pushing hard enough.
im doing all that i can to be there but i guess im not doing every little thing.
im trying to turn myself into someone more understanding instead of just not caring..with you i feel like the better life i live the more i can achieve..
u showed me everything i needed too see..
you help me understand all i needed to understand you showed me a way out of something i thought didnt have a way out.
ive showed you a side of me no one really ever see's.
a side that is understandable..someone that is trying her best to achieve someone who is crying for help.. someone that is trying to see a light i cant even try to see..someone that is wanting just for a MAN to understand my life is not NORMAL her life Isnt Like any other! her life is something precious to me! just as much as my heart and trying to move foward soo much but the past just keeps holding on..everynight i toss and turn because the past just haunts my fears become of me...become a part of who i am! someone SCARED & WORRIED to feel that hurt that i felt 3 months ago...but with you im taking a chance because i see so much in you just as i see so much in me and just a lil more than i see in us! together! i always tell you im here for you when you need me! no matter what it is im listening to what your problem is. blocking everthing else out to feel the pain you feel. i want to be a understanding person again. i want to start off riding with you! im always telling you my arms n ears are open so you wouldnt be afraid to just tell me anything you want or feel and be communicateable with each other so you wont feel soo alone because your not im here! here to stay as long as you need me to..
life takes you through soo much as you can see it tooke me thriugh alot these last 5 months took me through something i never thought id go through but now im happy cause i went with it through someone i know and hope will always be there!
you know who you are!

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Poem Submitted: Monday, May 10, 2010

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