Wednesday, April 9, 2008

Isolation At Sunrise Comments

Rating: 3.1
I awake,
Dreams burdened with your eyes.

A recollection of temperance

...

David DeSantis
COMMENTS
Ben Gieske 31 January 2009
Masterly done. I really like the following: Dreams burdened with your eyes, a soul as empty as the spirits in a glass, and unfair remnants of celestial lies. You used common images but not in a trite way.
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Elizabeth Sheaffer 28 January 2009
This is simply amazing. Stunning piece you have here. Awe-inspiring. Five thumbs up and two stars.
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Chitra - 19 November 2008
I sometimes wish I was a glass. It’s easier to break without a soul these lines are a masterpiece...
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Raynette Eitel 13 July 2008
This is an amazing poem 'From a soul as empty as the spirits in a glass' then followed by 'I sometimes wish I was a glass...' Nice work. But shouldnt it be I wish I WERE a glass? Your images are honed in, not overdone and you have caught the feeling in just a few words, as every poet should do. Raynette
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Delilah Miller 10 July 2008
Strange how an empty glass of alochol can make things so much heavier. It was frustrated and deep blue. Keep writing, Delilah
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Serenity Prayer 12 June 2008
i like this poem. its really sad, but very good. good job.
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~ Jon London ~ 08 May 2008
This is so deep, it reminds us all of how fragile we are, I wish sometimes that our hearts were wrapped in bubble wrap.. I hope yours will be looked after, and treated with the respect it's deserves. best wish you you bro...another fine write by Mr Desantis..keep it going Jon
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Onelia Avelar 29 April 2008
I sometimes wish I was a glass. It’s easier to break without a soul...Wow, this lines are crystal clear and beautiful! ! No comment.
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Sarah Abdullah 27 April 2008
I sometimes wish I was a glass. It’s easier to break without a soul. WOW It's Really Really Deep..and the words are sooo Wonderful Thx alot for sharing
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Lawrence S. Pertillar 25 April 2008
Mister DeSantis? 'Isolation at Sunrise' is to 'classic' as crystal is to glass. What a wonderful piece of art this is. I enjoyed reading this. The style, subject matter and your 'touch' has produced a 'memory'. You have captured the essence of a craftsman's skill....and 'delivered' an awesome 'work'! Beautiful.
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Flora Gillingham 22 April 2008
You always manage to convey depth with such a light touch, David. Wonderfully weighted phrasing. Really good poem. F
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Laoibhse Ni Canain 22 April 2008
This is a painfully beautiful piece. I love the last stanza, it resonates with me. Just as haunting as the sound that glass would make were I to run my fingers around the rim.
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L M 19 April 2008
Excuse me if I got this wrong, but is this in reference to a deceased child of your (one never born?) This is a painful poem, and you coveyed emotion quite well in it's unique and supple lines. I greatly enjoyed the glass metaphor.
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Lynda Robson 17 April 2008
A very poignant poem David, it says a lot and is simple but stunning as Yuri says, Well penned, Lynda xx
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Jurietta Duraan 15 April 2008
Aahh! stunning poem! .... in its simplicity it kicks you in the stomach, resonates in the heart....10/10
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Philip Housiaux 15 April 2008
Yes fine writing worthy of the scores its been given. A challenge to those of us who know that poetry is about capturing the essence but find ourselves with to much to say and needing too many words to do it. I will try your style.
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Sandra Fowler 14 April 2008
Praise for your sad, but beautiful poem. The last stanza is superb. Warm regards, Sandra
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R H 13 April 2008
An emotionally charged poem in which every single word counts - the imagery is particularly striking - a powerful and moving piece David. j.
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Original Unknown Girl 11 April 2008
Oh my word, so deep and filled with regret and loss.... so sorry. I am in agreement with Deana though, no isolation here at all, only community. Keep on penning them David. HG: -) xx
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Alison Cassidy 11 April 2008
You pen your despair with economy, and great emotional weight, David. Your final stanza is quite brilliant. love, Allie ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
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