Lone Ghost

Kill Me Right Now

It is in these long-faced solitary nights that I can notice
the considerable size of my longing to protect your heart
and safeguard it in the vault of my soul.

The moon is out gloomily projecting surreal shadows
upon the streets, as the birds sing sad, somber, songs
and breathe the melancholy infused in the desolating air,
the silent wind, like an upset dried ocean, travels the world round,
round, round, desperately searching in between the leaves,
in between every nest and corner in the sky,
never finding a destination, never finding the station
That will take my love to your secret location.
I drop on my knees as I remember this,
an impious dread arises from my gut,
envelops my existence until my body's energy
can't afford to be sad, and shuts my eyes.

You run away from me like the sheep from the wolf,
but last time while I was chasing you to show you my love,
as you were running away you looked back at me,
and lovingly, smiling, you winked both of your eyes,
showing no aversion, no fear but excitement, and supreme hope,

why do you have me behind your footprints then,
encountering the passion of you autumn
as withered yearnings of harsh cold winter
and then, confusing me even more,
just when I am about to undergo a terrible hypothermia,
you come with the solacing sun of your smile
and effervescence of your spring,
why can't you just be straight forward to me,
like a bullet, and murder my heart right now,
instead of a slowly painful exsanguination?
where are you trying to go with all this,
pain-inflicting 'seek and find' exhausting game?
Why can't we just walk side by side
in the same station of the year...

Are you trying to test my willingness to
see how far my martyrdom I can take,
or are you a masochist feeding on my pain and thirst,

If you never show up, just like the restless winter,
from desperate melancholic seeking, I should never be free.

So kill me right now,
my willingness to die for you is already yours,
I am not a masochist, as you might be, but I stand for love,
even if it means utter suffering and devastating pain.
So go ahead, or take me into your arms right now,
hug me tight and never ever let me go,
Go ahead! kill me right now...
or simply let me know,
so I can use my air to breathe,
instead of wind to keep chasing your sighs.

Topic(s) of this poem: love

Poem Submitted: Monday, February 13, 2017
Poem Edited: Monday, February 13, 2017

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