Ali Sabry

Gold Star - 7,340 Points (11/08/1988 / Iraq - Baghdad)

My Dear, - Poem by Ali Sabry

The other day, only about you I thought.
This time I’ve realized I need you a lot.
I saw a young woman walking towards me,
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Poet's Notes about The Poem

My Dear,

Comments about My Dear, by Ali Sabry

  • Alookh (matin) (9/18/2013 5:51:00 AM)

    oh! this one, i really admire! a perfect work Ali! ! ! ..................
    I can even smell the perfume I bought for you once.....i'm sure u truly love her....if only she bothered! ....: 1
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  • Major Elazia (8/23/2013 12:55:00 AM)

    Ali, the way you have begun the poem is not having a melodious impact, it sounds passive (The other day, only about you I thought) . Look at this suggestion Just a day gone by I thought only about you... Look my suggestion of your stanza 1
    Just a day gone by I thought only about you
    In that moment of time I realized I need you a lot
    The young woman I saw walking towards me had a strange familiarity
    A familiarity that made nostalgia a sadness in my memory shadows.......

    The place where you say

    I hope you will forgive me for my past errors.
    I didn’t have any other woman all these years.
    Every day I waited for your phone call.
    But you didn’t bother to phone me at all.
    This fails too build the desperation in you to have her back. The nostalgia that was anticipated in the first stanza does not come out with a punch.
    This is my suggestion
    I hope you find a place in your heart to forgive me from the past of errors
    For so long I have stayed without a woman for all this years
    With the hope that a phone call would come to break sorrow
    But empty expectations got blown with every hopes of tomorrow...

    Well, that is my suggestion, I do not criticize literary works, I critique and offer my opinions on how to make them better. I invite you to read my poem Encased in a Vacuum.
    (Report) Reply

  • (8/16/2013 9:22:00 AM)

    Nice poem. I hope she hears ur plea (Report) Reply

  • (8/7/2013 11:41:00 AM)

    New meanings and in a pretty package. (Report) Reply

  • Emeyazia Iwe Chukwudi (7/29/2013 5:29:00 AM)

    But you didn't bother to call... Very emotional poetically delivered, issues of the mind, a daily battle. Job well done great poet. (Report) Reply

  • Kelvin Owusu (7/29/2013 5:23:00 AM)

    this girl must be real special all the best (Report) Reply

  • Kolawole Ogunfowokan (7/13/2013 9:31:00 AM)

    She must really be something. Nice one. (Report) Reply

  • Moloy Bhattacharya (7/12/2013 11:13:00 PM)

    wonderful poem to read, and soothing for the soul as well...thanks a lot. (Report) Reply

  • Heather Wilkins (7/12/2013 12:01:00 PM)

    my other half- -the twin of my soul I want you to be lovely thought dear Ali (Report) Reply

  • Thungem Lam (7/6/2013 4:30:00 AM)

    Twings of the heart. You capture the heart of reader, it is a nice pieces of work, thumps up my friend. (Report) Reply

  • Patricia Grantham (7/6/2013 4:18:00 AM)

    A very loving poem for the one that
    you hold so dear. Such a passionate
    write written with good words. Enjoyed.
    (Report) Reply

  • Shaquille Henry (7/5/2013 10:25:00 AM)

    This is nice... Simplistic in style. (Report) Reply

  • Sesan Falade (7/5/2013 3:51:00 AM)

    beautiful! gooooooood job! (Report) Reply

  • Gajanan Mishra (7/1/2013 8:17:00 AM)

    better half, twin of the soul, good write, thanks.
    I invite you to read my poems and comment.
    (Report) Reply

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