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All that I wanted was for him to come back, so for weeks and weeks before and during the month of the living dead I studied for long hours looking for a solution. And nothing came. I looked at countless websites with black backgrounds and red text in unusual fonts, and only learned that it is black magic and for $24.95 I too can own Satanic/Vampiric/Wiccan bible. Satanic comes with a card, Vampiric a necklace, Wiccan a polished twig. I read as much fiction as possible and then tried to match it with the myths to create my own ritual. My search was inconclusive, but I do believe that the reanimated can be detected with a dragon egg, which will turn an unhealthy brown shade when the two meet. Usually the fetal dragon dies and oozes out through cracks in the shell. I even turned to my copy of the Malleus Maleficarum, in hopes that the authors had caught the witches and the devil doing something devious and relevant with the dead, but that too was a dead end. The Devil and the Witches had sex and danced naked, and the best way to kill a witch is to burn her. (Men back then also cared very much about the relation of their reproductive organs and a witches magic – can a witch truly truly vanish the organ? If so, then where does it go?) I must admit, I despaired. There was nothing that would bring him back. In numerous blind rages I sobbed and screamed, ripped up the books and printouts, kicked the walls and punched windows. And then, as if by some miracle, with bloody knuckles, ragged throat, and salty eyes, the solution came to me. Maybe it would not be as thorough as a ritual but would suffice nevertheless. Very carefully, so as not to damage any part of his body, I taped a wooden rod to his back in order for him to sit easily and attached hooks attached to strings to manipulate his fingers. And eventually I would figure out the finer mechanics of creating touch. I contorted his face into the familiar grin. We sat back on the bed. He stroked my cheek. I smiled, and fell asleep on his chest with his arms wrapped around me.

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6/12/2021 9:51:28 PM #