Monday, August 25, 2008

Numbers Comments

Rating: 5.0

Living a life in vain
Hiding from the light
Fighting tears as teh yelling magnifies
Rebuking, screaming curses of hate back at the faces of pain

...

Nichole Flynn
COMMENTS
Nichole Flynn 29 August 2008

Hey, thnx for the feedback guys! I really appriciat(sp) them. Go read some of my others!

0 0 Reply
Michael McCall 25 August 2008

There are some lines in this poem that I really like. 'Holding by a thread to this existence we call living' and 'It all starts with each of these and thus shall end with these as well'. Run a quick spell check. This portion seems vague to me-'Failure after failure leading me back to a woeful beginning/A beginning unlike any other/ A beginning imprisoned by numbers and races' I am not sure where this goes. Failures leading you to a beginning? If you want to make that more understandable you could, however there is a good chance it means something to you, if so... Only my opinion. I really do like those lines I mentioned in the beginning, and I feel like your poem flowed. I hope this isn't how you feel everyday... if it is, hang on! Keep writing. If nothing else it will make you a stronger person and you will know how you will want your life to be different then those you observe.

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Alex Bowden 25 August 2008

I like this. I feel its a very powerful poem and it seems like you put alot of thought into it. As I said, I like it =)

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