Should It Carry On? Poem by Jennifer English

How times have changed these last few hours
When cars have past and planes have flown
As flowers die and cats cry their mournful chorus
Yet here I sit, thinking of lives past

I keep telling myself that there’s nothing left
That life is not mine anymore
He is free from his torture, yet I’m not of mine
Flash backs cause pain like a picture taken

The unknown is unbearable
Not knowing who has actually moved on
Yet tempted to contact the soul of tunes
To see for myself what events have unfeld


My absence in his presence screams
Nothing known has caused these thoughts
Puzzlement is what I’ve leant to exist with
Does he remember anything of what was?

Would the past recognise the present?
In the heat of the night I write
Some part of my brain hopes he sees this
Another doesn’t want it seen by anyone but these eyes

The present is jeopardized by these thoughts
All could change if they carry on
The comfortable, safe life lived

Should it carry on?