Ryann Holland

The Blade- My Blade

I DONT KNOW WHAT WENT WRONG.
EVERYTHING JUST HAPPENS SO QUICK.
EVERY SINGLE SCAR ON MY BODY IS ACHING.
THE CUTS ARE MAKING MY STOMACH SICK.

I JUST CANT STOP USING THE BLADE,
ITS A PART OF MY LIFE NOW,
I WAS FIRST SCARED BUT NOW IM FAR FROM AFRAID,
THE ONLY THING I DO IN SARROWNESS IS LET OUT A POUT.

I WAS ONLY 12 WHEN I STARTED CUTTING MYSELF,
NOW IM 15,
3 YEARS OF BLOOD DRIPPING DOWN MY WRIST,
THE SCARS REALLY DIDNT FAZE ME.

EVERYTIME I GOT MAD,
EVERYTIME MY HEART WAS BROKEN,
EVERYTIME I WAS SAD,
I TOOK THE BLADE TO MY WRIST,
AND SOMETIMES MY LEGS,
IT FELT SO GOOD TO FEEL THE TOUCH OF THE BLADE,
I DONT KNOW WHAT HAS COME ABOUT ME.

THE BLADE IS MY BEST FRIEND,
ALWAYS THERE WHEN I NNED IT.
I DONT HAVE CONTROL OF ANGER,
ANGER HAS CONTROL OVER ME,
AND IT MAKES ME HURT MYSELF.

I PUT THE BLADE TO MY WRIST AND NECK,
HOPING TO CUT SO DEEP THAT I WILL DIE BECAUSE I CANT TAKE THIS SHIT ANYMORE.
THE BLADE IS MY BLADE.

IT CALLS MY NAME EVERY NIGHT,
STRAIGHT INTO THE BATHROOM I GO,
REACH INTO THE MIRROR,
NO HOPE, NO FEAR,
GRAB THE BLADE,
WITH ITS SHARP EDGES,
PRESS IT AGAINST MY WRIST,
THIS IS THE WAY IM GOING TO LIVE MY LIFE I SAY,
WHAT WOULD I DO WITHOUT THE BLADE- MY BLADE?

Poem Submitted: Monday, February 9, 2009

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Comments about The Blade- My Blade by Ryann Holland

  • Weeping Angel Abandoned (2/25/2010 5:54:00 AM)

    wow, I adore this. I cut too, its a release from the hurt and torment. I dont judge others, thats why i hurt myself, its better than hurting the people I love. keep writing as this is great.

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