~~thwarted Dream~~ Poem by Meena Iyer

Unseen hesitation warred,
With faint glimmer of passion..
Fortune miswrites..
And I am left with,
A land of barreness,
Where once crimson streaked
The inner lanes of my heart
I am now,
left with Viduity,

I welcome adversity,
Like a canopy,
Let it cacoon me,
Like a salve for the wound
And now,
this piece of orange,
This saree,
Arouses the feelings,
And I see,
dreams I never let myself see

I wish, It was me,
Who wiped the sweat, from your head
After a long tiring day
I wish, It was me,
That you wed.
And it was you, that marked my gateway,
To bliss, to love

And while you repose,
I wish, I could gently sneak into your arms
And our love be the only ambrose,
that we would seek
And as you find my various charms,
Oh so slowly,
I wish, I could color your dreams too

Furtively, I touch,
The small box that holds,
Everything denied to me,
A streak of red,
Ah! why oh why fortune played this game?
I know it never will be same,
I chance upon her

She who is your wife,
And that cherubic face,
Of your child
And I curtail my wild thoughts...
For it was never to be..
I know this saree will never be worn,
Like that life, that will never be born
Which once we dreamt about, together...


The theme of this poem is totally inspired by a scene in a tamil movie whose name I don't even remember but I would love to give the back ground....

This scene is pictured as a song.. and i dont remember the song even.. I have not tried to translate it or anything.. just my impression..

The heroine is a widow and in dire straits.. hero, who is now married to someone else finds her and shelters her in his house. The wife knows about their past and is sympathetic. Heroine isnt much educated as is norm in the village.. however they r childhood sweethearts.. before the hero could his education(he was away) .. the situation at the girls family changes and under duress she marries someone else.. And eventually he does to..

So in this situation, she is living in his house as a nanny to take care of his kids. Its diwali and he(his wife infact) gives her gift of clothes... which is also a norm out here.. Well so she dreams what it would be to marry him.. when she chances upon his family picture which brings her back with a bang...