Uber Slut

Thoughts overheat
Circling my brain
I'm ready to abuse them
Beat away the pain
The taste triggers
My insides to crawl up my throat
I drink faster, pushing them back
Make sure they can't float

Five down
Thirty minutes has passed
See dark for five seconds
Find myself on my ass

I wobble around
In my own custom dance
I'm trying to keep the groove going
But gravity wont give me that chance

Everyone is protective
Eyes filled with concern
Try to calm me down
But on my drive still burns

Feelings I've always had
Are unleashed and feel brave
I want to know what it's like
But I'm digging self respect a grave

When did I kiss him
How did that start
To where it led
Did I play a part?

Sobering now
Realize what I'm doing
Stop it how?
This wasn't innocent flirting

Awkwardness stings
From the look on his face
Leading him on
Seems to be the case

Go our seperate ways
Avoid each other for days
Am I a slut
In how many ways?

Dread school
The constant wondering
Does everyone know
Are they enjoying my suffering?