Geraldine Moorkens Byrne
What I Gave Up For New Year - Poem by Geraldine Moorkens Byrne
how many years have I parroted
that I would give up the usual:
give up the fags and lose weight?
Drink less, walk more?
this year I am trying
for new and less banal
brighter and more imaginative
new year's demands.
I will give up
people who are bad for me
I will eschew their vision of me
that binds me, limits me.
I will renounce their prejudice of me
the way I am diminished by their
narrow and self serving lies.
I will give up
their sense of my failure
their disappointment at me
the way they wanted more from me
the way they expect so little of me
I will avoid, the saturated fat of life
the easy sense of usefulness that comes
from being all things to all people
and I will accept
that tough decisions make enemies.
I will resolve to
be more of me and less of them
to put me first, and mine,
ahead of everyone else and theirs.
I will make time that is mine,
and remove it from the claws
of duty or commitment,
squander it gloriously
in half hours of decadence
and no long er apologise
no more say sorry
to people who see kindness as
I will be ruthless in my giving
as in my taking
stopping when I need too, refusing
to have gratuity
redefined as obligation.
And if they want to take, let them say
please and thank you.
I resolve on this, to remember
each day has its own beauty
distinct from the place it left
and irrelevant to its destination.
I promise myself, that i have
no less and no more than my rights
and will not accept the judgement
passed on me by others, whose
failed agendas seek me out
to hold me up, to expose and denude
instead i will clothe and adorn
myself if noone else will.
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