(Dedicated to Anna Nicole Smith who died February 8,2007.)
You were blond, beautiful and busty too.
You were very young and America misses you.
(Dedicated to Chris Farley who died December 18,1997.)
We loved a comedian who was very funny and loved to shout.
Chris Farley was the man who I'm talking about.
(This is a fictional poem)
I'm in Vietnam and I'm a prisoner of war.
Regaining my freedom is the only thing I have to live for.
Last week I tried to get out of paying for a meal.
But when it backfired, I became quite ill.
Some women have rejected me because I don't have a lot of money.
They thought they were being smart but they were really being crummy.
Geico.com makes fun of us and now ABC is making fun of us too.
They'll both soon be bankrupt because we cavemen are going to sue.
I committed murder and it bothers me everyday.
I killed over twenty people when I was with the CIA.
Your son came to school today with a bloody lip and a black eye.
He said you did it and then he started to cry.
I had to pay two cents to the post office because of you.
Now opening a can of whoop ass is what I'm going to have to do.