Poems

When it came to chesty women, I was obsessed.
I wanted a woman who had large breasts.
Now I'm 75 years old and I have something to confess.
I am an old man and I've grown large breasts.
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I hate ambulances because when I hear their sirens, I know that people have been hurt.
I'd give anything if accidents were something that people could avert.
Ambulance sirens make me sad because people may be dying or dead.
It's terrible to know that they're in pain and that they've bled.
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You and I are the apple of God's eye.
He treasures each of us and that's no lie.
He loves us so much that it nearly makes him burst.
He gives us the strength to go on when things are going the worst.
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It's Valentine's day but I have no Valentine.
I hope that your love life is better than mine.
Tell your Valentine how much she means to you, it will come in handy.
Show her how much you care by buying her some candy.
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(This is a fictional poem)

I'm really frightened because I'm about to die in this electric chair.
I was convicted for a murder I didn't commit and that wasn't fair.
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(This is a fictional poem)

My wife is a vegetarian and she wants me to be one too.
She's forbidding me to eat meat, what am I going to do?
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(This is a fictional poem)

I became a cop when I witnessed my father's death.
I swore to uphold the law as he took his final breath.
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(Dedicated to Ida Greene who died July 5,2008.)

Ida was her name and she was my mom's former stepmother.
For eighteen months she helped take care of Mom, her sister and her brothers.
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(THIS IS A FICTIONAL POEM)

Your dog is humping my leg.
You better stop him or I'll bust your head.
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Twenty years ago a man lived in his car.
He did something that was really bizarre.
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