You made it!
You reached the goal!
I want you to be my lover.
Not my partner but my lover.
That person I meet on the side.
The one who is secret and no one else knows even when others are around.
The day eases in and out so quietly.
Time passes and never a moment goes away
that I do not think about you.
Your ghost and essence are always playing
You say we are friends and that is fine.
But then you treat me like a leper and I do not understand.
I have known you now for almost ten years and still you are a puzzle to me.
One day you smile and bring me into your circle and if I come close to walking in you move the edge.
It's been years the memory is still clear.
Impressions of a face remain.
Freshness of youth intact, unspoiled.
Perfume of roses and wild flowers newly cut still briefly lingers in the air.
God, please take these feelings away.
I know that they have been there all my life.
I have been able to close the door on them
in the past.
I wish that I could just simply disappear and go away.
I want to run from here as fast and far away as I can.
You do not seem to know what you do to me.
Do you understand just far over the edge you push me and then grab me back?
Do you realize the senses that you fulfill with each movement and breath you take?
Can you begin to know just how very sensual you really are?
I think about the moment you died.
They told us it was painless, that you could not have felt the impact.
But I know better, and I wish I did not.
I can imagine the fear you felt rising as you saw the oncoming headlights glaring brighter and brighter until all sight was a single blinding light.
A quiet place to escape from this loud and deafening world of madness.
A quiet place to carry with me everywhere I go.
A refuge of peace and stillness to get away and be silent.
A place where happiness and love surround and engulfs me.