Quotes

It's relatively easy to act nice and normal in front of a crowd, or in public. The tricky part is doing it in private.

Writers begin with a grain of sand, and then create a beach.

Most of my girlfriends are sent by the Devil and seem genuinely bemused when I do not succumb to their powers.

'The best time to do anything, get drunk, surf, run, take a walk, gamble, make love, get high, watch a movie, read a book, is on a Monday, when everyone else is at work, as their depression will heighten your celebration, of not being them.'

'Writers and other artists are mostly just historians, produced by nature to describe, decipher and thus historically represent the universe.'

"Life must be terrible for working people, considering they spend every Friday night celebrating a two day break from it."

"Writers should cut as close to the vein as possible. The readers don't want to be covered in your warm sticky blood, but they want to come as close to it as possible."

If you write about the dark side of people, you are more likely to be closer to the truth, because people don't pretend to be dark, nearly as much as they pretend to be good.

"The problem with working, I mean not self-employed, is that you have to get up and routinely do something that you do not want to do, plus you get talked down to, ordered around by twats, you know you are better than. In reality, you are no better than a slave, no better than a hamster running on a wheel. You could say the hamster likes to run on the wheel, the hamster runs on the wheel by choice. But do not forget, the hamster is always in a cage, and will never be anything else, but a hamster running on a wheel inside a cage, unless it escapes the cage."

"Human beings will be remembered as the race who tried to destroy everything they did not understand. People, animals, plants, even the giant ball they called home."