I am Samantha, a 14 year old girl lost in a world where I feel like no one understands me. I don't even understand myself all the time. Writing poetry is one of the few things keeping me alive. I feel I can only fully express myself through poetry. If anyone wants to talk to me, email me any time. I have been through depression, a suicide attempt, am struggling with an eating disorder, and cut sometimes.
I hate you because you're taking over me,
but I love you 'cause you're making me the girl I want to be.
Why do I love you when all you do is put me down?
Making me starve 'till I fit into the smallest gown.
Before now I had never really thought about my weight,
but now the scale is my worst enemy.
Food is a thing I have begun to hate;
I can't ever be thin enough.
Spinning, swirling, lost in confusion,
not even knowing what I am thinking.
Falling, crying, bleeding, dying,
Into this pit of depression I'm slowly sinking.
No one understands the perfection I seek,
the reflection I see everyday.
No one hears the words I speak,
my fear of how much I weigh.