Biography of William Chaplar
William Chaplar Poems
If the English language was indeed one without flaws, inlaws—once the divorce was final—would become outlaws. There'd be a whole new way for us to spell words such as sleigh. And none would be confused when they looked at the word croquet.
Civil War Ballad
America, America, sweet land of liberty. But how could you so easily condone captivity? Abolition was the call for half the citizenry. The other half seemed well content with gross iniquity.
Don'T Stop The Laughter
Because adolescence is inopportune, too many are trying to grow up too soon. Instead of believing that your life's a flop, try remembering where you were when the laughter stopped.
A marathoner starts a race but quits after a mile, and people ask why he so poorly fared. It doesn't take a genius or that awfully long a while for all to see that he was not prepared.
If There Were No Players
"Don't hate the player, hate the game" is something people say, as if that makes the things they do seem more or less okay. Their circumstances help them to believe they're not to blame. But if there were no players, then there wouldn't be a game.
My Sister's Child
The world that we live in will not be so wild in the lifetime of my sister's child. With the planet, our species will be reconciled in the lifetime of my sister's child.
Say What You Mean
Your portly sister asks you if her dress makes her look fat. I'm sorry, but there's just one way for you to answer that. "Yes! " must be your abrupt reply, though it might cause dismay. 'Cause if you don't say what you mean, you can't mean what you say.
This past year on Saint Patrick's Day, I made a huge mistake. I made a stupid comment, and it caused a friend heartache. At a table filled with people, I commented with a wink, "Saint Patrick's Day's a great excuse for friends to have a drink."
Why Does No One Cite Leviticus?
Why does no one cite Leviticus? Didn't it have things to say? People spend the live-long day repeating what John had to say.
Not The Man...
I hate to think what you've been told since back when you were four years old. But just in case you give a damn, I'm not the man you think I am.
Solomon, David, And Saul
Kings in the Old Testament numbered a lot, and few can remember them all. But even those of us who ditched Sunday school know Solomon, David, and Saul.
Quitters Never Win
One year I had a math teacher who made me want to cry! I never understood those things she did with 'x' and 'y'! She told us if we stayed in school, we'd broaden all our minds. And then she said it's her job to see no child's left behind.
Do The Math
This is for all the plus-sized folk who battle with the scale; who time and time again have been on diets that have failed. You confront people who feel obligated to advise on all the negative aspects connected to your size.
My Friend's Name Is Nora
My friend's name is Nora; she's all alone. She lives at the group home, 'cause her family's gone. And everyone there tries to see her side, But Nora she has lost her will to fly.
A marathoner starts a race but quits after a mile,
and people ask why he so poorly fared.
It doesn't take a genius or that awfully long a while
for all to see that he was not prepared.
A football team ranked number one gets beat their opening game
by one that all agree could not compare.
It doesn't take a sportscaster of nationwide acclaim
to figure out that they were not prepared.