Woody Allen

(1935 / The Bronx, New York City, New York)

Woody Allen Quotes

  • ''It's my second favorite organ.''
    Woody Allen (b. 1935), U.S. filmmaker, and Marshall Brickman, screenwriter. Woody Allen. Victor Shakapopolis (Woody Allen), in Sleeper (film) (1973).
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  • ''It's not that I'm afraid to die, I just don't want to be there when it happens.''
    Woody Allen (b. 1935), U.S. filmmaker. Without Feathers, "Death (A Play)," (1976).
  • ''A relationship, I think, is like a shark, you know? It has to constantly move forward or it dies. And I think what we got on our hands is a dead shark.''
    Woody Allen (b. 1935), U.S. filmmaker. repr. In Four Films of Woody Allen (1982). Alvy Singer (Allen), in Annie Hall, directed by Woody Allen, scripted by Allen with Marshall Brickman (1977). Reaching the end of his affair with Annie Hall (Diane Keaton).
  • ''I was thrown out of N.Y.U. my freshman year ... for cheating on my metaphysics final. You know, I looked within the soul of the boy sitting next to me.''
    Woody Allen (b. 1935), U.S. filmmaker. Directed by Woody Allen, scripted by Allen with Marshall Brickman (1977. Alvy Singer (Allen), in Annie Hall, Four Films of Woody Allen (1982). Doing standup comedy in front of a college audience.
  • ''I don't respond well to mellow, you know what I mean, I—I have a tendency to ... if I get too mellow, I—I ripen and then rot.''
    Woody Allen (b. 1935), U.S. filmmaker, and Marshall Brickman, U.S. screenwriter. Directed and scripted by Woody Allen, scripted with Marshall Brickman. Alvy Singer (Allen), in Annie Hall (film) (1977, repr. In Four Films of Woody Allen 1982). Explaining to Annie Hall (Diane Keaton) why he is passing on a marijuana party.
  • ''Life is divided up into the horrible and the miserable.''
    Woody Allen (b. 1935), U.S. filmmaker, and Marshall Brickman, U.S. screenwriter. Alvy Singer (Allen), in Annie Hall (film) (1977). repr. In Four Films of Woody Allen (1982).
  • ''In Beverly Hills ... they don't throw their garbage away. They make it into television shows.''
    Woody Allen (b. 1935), U.S. filmmaker, and Marshall Brickman, screenwriter. Alvy Singer (Allen), in the film Annie Hall (1977). repr. In Four Films of Woody Allen (1982).
  • ''My grammy never gave gifts, you know. She was too busy getting raped by Cossacks.''
    Woody Allen (b. 1935), U.S. filmmaker, actor, and Marshall Brickman (b. 1941), U.S. screenwriter. Alvy Singer (Woody Allen), Annie Hall, after hearing about Annie Hall's "grammy," (1977).
  • ''Harvard makes mistakes too, you know. Kissinger taught there.''
    Woody Allen (b. 1935), U.S. filmmaker, actor, and Marshall Brickman (b. 1941), U.S. screenwriter. Alvy Singer (Woody Allen), Annie Hall, to a couple on the street (1977).
  • ''I heard that Commentary and Dissent had merged and formed Dysenery.''
    Woody Allen (b. 1935), U.S. filmmaker, actor, and Marshall Brickman (b. 1941), U.S. screenwriter. Alvy Singer (Woody Allen), Annie Hall, at a cocktail party (1977).

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