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  • James Ferguson (2/23/2009 12:55:00 PM) Post reply

    Hello all....New boy here.

    Not sure if i will even get a single comment
    but still, why do I feel i must
    I have posted my first ever poem online
    to your interpretation i trust

    I would really appreciate any feedback on 'consequence'. I have written other pieces in my 'pad' but I think i lack confidence in my ability to write. Do i write poems or lyrics or something else? i'm not sure.
    Why do i feel the need to fit into a box?

    Thanks for reading.....

    Tank Ferg

  • Stephen Stirk (2/20/2009 9:19:00 AM) Post reply | Read 1 reply

    Hello Everyone. Kindly read my serious Shakesperian poem
    'Dawns First Light'. It took me 38.72 years to write it and
    I have written it without any of the red words which are
    banned. Dawns First Light is about a woman who buys a torch.
    No................I don't want to spoil it for you.


    DAWNS FIRST LIGHT
    As Dawn breaks pale and grey from darkened sleep
    Dispels the clouds which out of nightfall creep

    As Dawn awakes projects her shadow through the door
    The sky mutates I watch it turn azure

    As Dawn peeks through the window pane
    To signify first light of morn again

    As Dawn dresses the window in blinding light
    And gives the gazing soul a gorgeous sight

    As Dawn caresses all that wake in daylight fair
    As light and sun lay Dawns sweet virtue bare

    As Dawns gown falls, and breaks to morning time
    As Dawns new beauty helped to craft this rhyme

    As Dawn stands by the window my heart flickers
    Leave the window Dawn! at least put on some knickers

    Replies for this message:
    • Duh Huh (2/21/2009 9:17:00 PM) Post reply

      This is beautiful, and funny. I saw it too, as your words took me there, I, however; closed my eyes at the end lol....Wonderful poem :)

  • Linda Winchell (12/23/2008 5:14:00 PM) Post reply | Read 1 reply

    'A Finger In Your Nose'


    You shouldn't put your finger
    deep within your nose!
    It really doesn't look too sheik!
    and it's not where it should go!

    Now if your digging for gold nuggets!
    then your not digging where they're at!
    Your fingers are suppose to do other things
    like maybe tip or maybe tap?

    Now when you place a digit there
    deep where it can't be seen!
    You may pull out a big surprise
    something sticky and colored green!

    Linda Winchell

    Replies for this message:
    • Vern Eaker (1/22/2009 6:58:00 AM) Post reply

      Actually I do intend to pick at this little booger you have so proudly displayed here for all to read, I though really enjoyed reading it as it has good flow and depth, (possibly to the first knuckle) ... more

  • Linda Winchell (12/23/2008 11:00:00 AM) Post reply | Read 1 reply

    'Old Braided Rug'


    I found an old hand made braided rug
    at a thrifty store, the other day.
    It was quite a dirty sight to see
    with some of its edges frayde.

    I bought it up and rushed it home!
    to give this little rug, a gentle loving needed bath.
    And when it was cleaned, there was seen
    braided memories of someone's past.

    One braided rope weaved into another
    a child's pajamas or maybe a robe?
    Then an old flour bag, 'Velvet Flour'
    was the logo, in this rug they'd sewed.

    Then what looked to be a small center piece
    remnants of someone's wedding gown.
    I think they placed it there on purpose
    Sort of like this little rugs, jeweled crown.

    Memories of someone's life
    braided into this useful little rug.
    To place in front of a sink or bed
    giving where ever placed, a little braided hug.

    I don't know if anyone still makes them
    these journals of a persons past?
    But this little braided rug is now mine to treasure
    to be enjoyed as long as it will last.

    Linda Winchell

    Replies for this message:
    • Vern Eaker (1/22/2009 7:02:00 AM) Post reply

      A simply wonderful poem warm, descriptive and sentimentally touching and quaint. keep writing.

  • Gerald Mccandless (12/21/2008 3:05:00 AM) Post reply

    good evening

  • Zoe Mathias (12/16/2008 10:11:00 PM) Post reply

    Hello there ^-^

    I was wondering if someone would be so kind as to take a look at the poem I have written. (I gather this is a pretty standard request to be asking, nor do I expect much response) .

    Any criticism is welcome, as long as it is constructive and not just rude.

    Thank you very much,

    Zoe

  • Sarah Pajarillo (12/8/2008 3:58:00 PM) Post reply

    i am new to this whole site and just added a couple of poems! i have not written in years so if you all could crit and help me to regain my poetic-ness again! i would really appreciate it!

  • Baden Ronie (11/30/2008 6:28:00 AM) Post reply

    hey,
    well iv only been writing around a month or two, so i was hoping that you guys would be willing to take some of your valuable time to have a read and tell me what you think, leave me some comments and ratings please :)

    also i never though there was a SPECIFIC way poetry should be written, i just believe it should come from the heart, so not all of mine will rhyme and some may even be more story like but give them a chance!

    thanks,
    Baden

  • Karima Astrid P (11/22/2008 3:23:00 AM) Post reply

    please check out my poems..and hope you leave some comments
    thanks

  • April Breeland (11/16/2008 10:20:00 PM) Post reply

    I have recently posted a poem called Notes... I would love feedback!
    Also my poems
    Storm
    Imagine
    Your Hands
    The Cross

    Thank You
    Bless all of you
    April

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