Freeform Workshop

Workshop for poetry written in free forms.
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Moriah Cyr Female, 38, United States (6/21/2005 6:40:00 AM)

(This massage was posted as a reply to that message)

OOOPPPSS.... I forgot the 'poem'. :)

Here goes.

Don't Touch

Don't touch me...
I cannot bear you touch me there.
My heart's in shambles, no longer there.
I've hidden away my deepest spring for fear
you'll drink me dry.
I am no longer yours.
Clipped tongues and broken wings will take us nowhere.
An intimate battle of love gone wrong, we fight till the death.
There cannot be a winner here for neither will give in.
I want out... my skin crawls at the thought that
you will be near me yet again.
I can't dispell the images running through my head.
I want to flee... to be... to see...
Something pure.
And it's not here.

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  • Rookie Casey Rock (7/14/2005 6:37:00 PM) Post reply
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    I agree with the other comment posted. Try to write the poems in a specific tone or voice that is unique to you, and read a ton. I recommend Richard Brautigan, Charles Bukowski, And Pablo Neruda (all classics) to see how each uses words in a unique way to convey their ideas. I am also relatively new so take what I say with a grain of salt, but I hope it helps.

  • Rookie Eric Paul Shaffer (6/30/2005 10:38:00 PM) Post reply

    Read some current poems in poetry reviews and in the poetry section of your local bookstore and even here on this website. I think you'll see that this 'expressive' style is not serving you well. Focus on images and the voice you really speak in to make your poems. Avoid cliches. Avoid love poems until you're over it.

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