Treasure Island

Rhythm and Rhyme Workshop

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  • Christine Blaydes Rookie - 1st Stage (6/8/2012 11:09:00 AM) Post reply

    I can't help but ryhme in my poems, is that ever a bad thing?Please check out some of my poetry and tell me what you think. Thank you.

  • Ryan Walker Rookie - 1st Stage (5/22/2012 5:13:00 PM) Post reply

    For those of you who wish to partake in rhyme, it is essential you have a scheme. Rhyme provides a lift of serendipity, but there has to be a pattern for such an emotion to occur.

    For those who wish for Rhythm, rhyme is a part; but the most important part is the metre. For those who wish to experiment, I suggest Iambic Pentameter. It is perhaps the most common form of metre in the English language. It consists of 14 lines of 10 syllables in an iambic fashion of unstressed and stressed. Try it with several poems; remmeber you are experimenting. There is no need for it to be perfect. It just has to be in the format. Then when you feel comfortable, try experimenting even more.

  • Miss Darkness Rookie - 1st Stage (5/18/2012 11:04:00 AM) Post reply

    check my poems plz post ur comments and rate them :)) (read: the illusionist, taking my revenge, tasting my death, the dance of life must end, a dream if fighting to be real.. i think those are the best i wrote) thank u ^_^

  • Robert Winthrop Rookie - 1st Stage (5/6/2012 12:03:00 PM) Post reply | Read 1 reply

    I wrote this song recently and my friend wrote the music. We gave it to a friend who is with the Grand Ol' Opry and we hope it will be recorded.


    Aw! Somebody made you sad and blue.

    Aw! Someone has made a fool of you.

    Aw! Some thing he said was so unkind.

    Aw! Sometimes he played tricks with your mind.

    Aw! Somehow he got you off your track.

    Aw! Some days you know he won’t come back.

    Aw! Some way you’ll get back on your feet.

    Aw! Sometime your life will be complete.

    Though today the skies are gray and dark.

    And you feel you’ll never find your mark,

    Rise up tall and smile a great big smile.

    Laugh, the sun will shine in just awhile.

    Aw! Somewhere somebody waits for you.

    Aw! Somebody’s heart is broken too.

    Aw! Someone will come because he saw some

    Awesome things in you. You’re awesome.

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  • Bernard Eseo Rookie - 1st Stage (5/6/2012 4:24:00 AM) Post reply | Read 1 reply

    I May Not Be

    I May Not Be by Bernard Eseo

    I may not be a singer
    But I’ll sing a thousand times a day
    I may not be writer
    But I’ll write for you without any pay

    I may not be a dancer
    But my actions will express my love
    I may not be an athlete
    But I’ll play by the rules of up above

    I may not be a superhero
    But I’ll save you with a smile
    I may not be a debater
    But I’ll be there within a dial.

    I may not be your Prince Charming
    But I’ll be there to what I can
    I may not always be with you
    But I promise, I’m your number one fan

    - Hope you guys can critique on my poems and this one! Thanks! Appreciated. ;)

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  • John Hazon Palen Rookie - 1st Stage (5/3/2012 8:32:00 PM) Post reply

    Whatever you may call this, just know that this came from my heart:

    I love! I thank all the people behind this website for the support they've given to me since I joined in. This encourages me in a lot of ways as I also am taking a degree in BS InfoTech, lucky enough being a gov't scholar to help my family. I am looking forward in the future about working for such wonderful website. I hope it will be as sooner as possible for I want to get my mom to the hospital to get checked up because she now suffers from an illness which really does bother me. If only I can treat her and take away the pain by myself, I wouldn't take the risk of putting my reputation low. I need someone who can help me all for the love of my family. I have my dreams in life and it includes for all the members of my family, especially my dear parents. Out of all the things in life that I could fear, the only thing that would hurt me is if I'd loose someone I love!

  • Yasir Khan Niazi Rookie - 1st Stage (5/3/2012 11:36:00 AM) Post reply


  • Godfrey Morris Rookie - 1st Stage (5/2/2012 8:45:00 AM) Post reply

    My dear friends, your critique on my poems are well desired and appreciated

  • Joshua Crumpton Rookie - 1st Stage (4/22/2012 9:02:00 AM) Post reply | Read 1 reply

    The Mirror
    As I gaze at the mirror that hangs, what is this that I see.
    As I stare, I wonder how this person looking back is who I've come to be.

    I look into those eyes, in which seem to only behold sadness.
    Lonely no matter where I turn, and can't seem to escape this madness.

    If I were to look into that heart, and through my very soul,
    I would find a world of emptiness and pain that I can't seem to control.

    Yet I don't move, and can't see, it's like in darkness I feel blind.
    Why do I continue to stare at this mirror, what is it that I hope to find?

    There is a dark side of the mirror, in which I'm afraid to say,
    Feeling like a demon from hell cast out to play.

    That's the part that does evil and idiotic things,
    No matter what happens and what it brings.

    I try to keep it in, something I must get rid of or atleast hide.
    But I can't bury it, because still it's lurking deep down inside.

    As I look upon this mirror, I see so much anger and pain.
    I've tried to hide it, but no matter what the mirror still remains.

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  • jas Cagz Rookie - 1st Stage (4/10/2012 12:38:00 PM) Post reply | Read 2 replies

    [DARLING] I want to be with you when you walk the dog,

    Check out rainbow's on a broken log,

    I'm sad when you say I'm walking along the beach,

    I hold out my hand but your out of reach,

    When I hear your voice I close my eye's,

    Pretend I'm there and shout surprize,

    I want to smell you everyday,

    Love and kiss you in everyway,

    I'd hold you close and yes you know,

    I'd never ever let you go.

    Replies for this message:
    • Robert Winthrop Rookie - 1st Stage (5/6/2012 12:08:00 PM) Post reply

      Nice poem. However, check spelling " you're out of reach, " every way-two words, surprise with an s, hold you close and, yes, you know.

    • Ralph The Elf Rookie - 1st Stage (4/22/2012 3:07:00 AM) Post reply

      if this is real then let her know you only lose if you don't show your love and care and for the maiden that makes you feel like a baby

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