Rhythm and Rhyme Workshop
(3/19/2007 8:24:00 AM)
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I'm beggining to lose my love of rhythm. Can you still call a poem a poem when you find yourself tapping it out on your knee with a pencil?
(3/18/2007 9:37:00 AM)
I'm fairly new to Poemhunter
and i was wondering if u can check out my poems
i use a lot of rhyme in mine cuz i love it!
(3/17/2007 5:31:00 AM)
I enjoy reading poetry written with rhythm and rhyme most of all, and small children enjoy it because, they tell me, it is fun. However, I must say that I have seen some terrible examples of this type of writing. Some of it can be as tacky as the sort of things you read inside cheap birthday cards. There is certainly a place in the intellectual world also for rhyming poetry, and many of our great poets have used it very successfully. I would say that, as a start to writing in this way, why not take the work of a great writer and examine how he has written, ie, the rhythm, the metre, the metaphors he uses and everything else. You can practise mirroring (or reflecting) his/her poem. Here is an example:
Down By The Salley Gardens
By William Butler Yeates
DOWN by the salley gardens my love and I did meet;
She passed the salley gardens with little snow-white feet.
She bid me take love easy, as the leaves grow on the tree;
But I, being young and foolish, with her would not agree.
In a field by the river my love and I did stand,
And on my leaning shoulder she laid her snow-white hand.
She bid me take life easy, as the grass grows on the weirs;
But I was young and foolish, and now am full of tears.
Then my shadow/mirror of this lovely little poem:
BY THE WATERFALLS OF ILKLEY
By the waterfalls of Ilkley, my love and I did meet
Her eyes were filled with loveliness, her cherry lips were sweet.
She warned me not to love her, with a warning so severe
But my heart told me otherwise, and my ears, they didn't hear.
In the springtime, ‘neath the cherry trees, I looked at her again –
To tell me not to fall for her, was to tell me quite in vain.
She warned me not to love her – her words were loud and clear –
But now I’m standing by the riverside, without my Ruby dear.
I would also suggest, that people who wish to be good writers, learn how to use punctuation correctly, especially the apostrophe and inverted commas. Even simple things, such as commas, can make a big difference to the meaning. It goes without saying, that a good writer will always check their spelling too, but there is nothing worse than seeing someone writing their mother-tongue without even bothering to check what they have written, or writing in a way that suggests they are just texting a message on a mobile phone. Am I alone in thinking along these lines?
(3/4/2007 10:15:00 PM)
Gosh, I've been waiting a long time for a 'workshop' on this forum. lol.
(2/27/2007 6:35:00 PM)
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Alright heres a new one i came up last Satuday, tell me your thoughts please.
'I Never Liked My Odds'
You better not compromise
My eternal ties
With my family and my lovers
Let me hide beneath the covers
Cause the truth is
I don't think i could survive
A hundred to one
And in my 1% rise my courage
Just to be shot down by my ninety-nine fears
hold on wait a second
Let me comprhend
Let me mend
SO please agree with
My, my, my, my
Cause i most certaintly
To an ever overflowing pond
That is my obstacle
Yes, under the covers i will stay
Till there be a day
When odds are counted out
So that i may see what odd are about
I would appreciate your comments, cause saying nothing wont help me get any better, Thank you! ! !
(1/29/2007 9:03:00 PM)
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After I write most of my 'Rhythm & Rhyme' Poetry,
I read it while tapping my toe to see if I've accomplished a BEAT.
Here's an example...'Rais'n Hell at the Bar & Grill'
In Trailer Park Zoo, North of Ludlow,
SUE danced to the song on her radio.
Hollered ''Hell, yeah! ''..like a true Red Neck,
While kissing her monthly Welfare Check.
Bosoms were hoisted by an up-lift bra.
Her girdled tush looked snugly un-flawed.
Dimpled flesh held taut - by tight Spandex.
Her trailer park key, swung from her neck.
Newly divorced, she guzzled down...
Her last cold beer. Then, headed for town.
Parked her truck at the Bar & Grill.
''A Trailer Park Queen, out for a thrill.''
Hiding away any money she had.
''I'll find a Loser to pay my Bar Tab! ''
She spied two fools, sharing a stool.
T'was Siamese Twins, Jim + Joe O'Toole.
Some-Are Teeth, they grinningly bared.
''Some-are...here and some-are...there.''
Tho' their hideousness caused Sue to stare.
She stuck to them, like a hare in a snare.
On four knees, she sat, drinking ''Free Beer! ''
Flirt'n and hug'n and kiss'n their ears.
Trouble began when Joe asked for a dance,
En-raging Jim, cause he wanted first chance.
Two brothers fighting, attached at the groin.
Sue yelled ''Can't yah just... flip a coin? ''
Oops! Too late! All 3 toppled to the floor.
''You %#* Morons.''..she cursed and swore.
In handcuffs, the twins were lead away.
Regretting their quarrel with deepest sorrow.
''I hope she returns the $500 she borrowed! ''
Miles away, in the comfort of home,
An idea sparked. Sue grabbed the phone.
''Male Escort Service? Please, send me 3.
I've 500 reasons to...PAR-TEE! ''
(12/12/2006 6:00:00 PM)
This Friday as every Friday since last Friday is booze night with crazy poemos and stories so u r all welcome to write something and add it to ur list, if u like.
All the best and more
(11/30/2006 4:53:00 PM)
Any French or French speakin fellow poemhunters out there could tell me your opinion for Le chasseur de l'esprit.Its my poemo Mindhunter in French though I dont know French, with a little help of a friend of mine I manage to write it.
(11/27/2006 2:10:00 PM)
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What do you all think of organising a day for booze? Let say Friday and we write about our favourite drinks and crazy stories relating to booze and call it
'Friday night is pie-eyed night.'Francesca Johnson gave me the idea and the name.
(11/9/2006 7:02:00 PM)
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What a relief and how pleased I am to find a place where rhyming poetry is appreciated. I will be coming back now as often as possible.