Rhythm and Rhyme Workshop
(3/18/2014 1:25:00 PM)
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I can't believe I wrote a poem in like 2 minutes without even thinking!
(3/17/2014 9:51:00 PM)
I was being super-duper rhythmic today. Moving. Grooving. Being rhythmic to the max. I wish I would have written that sh*t down. 'Lost opportunity' was all I could think about. Darn-it!
(3/10/2014 11:58:00 AM)
I just finished moving over here from the Freeform Workshop. Pens, pencils, paper, coffee pot. The works. I've made the switch to rhythm and meter. No more Free-form stuff. That's baby stuff. Much to some people's chagrin, I've abandoned Free-form. Free-form is for numbskulls anyway. 'Oh, look at my red wheelbarrow, how wet it is' Jesus, what crap! There's no movement. No 'music' in that kind of stuff. I want to flow like water down a stream, gurgling past rocks and boulders. Flowing rhythmically across the grassy knoll is my charge!
Oh, and rhyming! I almost forgot. I want to rhyme everything! 'Come hither, my little zither', and 'bop, bop, allu-bop, a bing, bang, boom'. You know, poems with complicated meter and rhyming. I want to start with limericks. Limericks are so musical. You can dance a little jig while you recite them. You can recite them (while atop a table in a pub) dancing a little jig. (See how I repeated that?Very rhythmic, like Ovid, my ancestor) I want to dance around like Gene Kelly (Irish guy) singing my limericks to other drunk people is basically what I'm saying.
(3/6/2014 7:34:00 AM)
Dear fellows. I was until recently a soldier, of a very elite group. And as a result wanted something more beautidful in my life. I; ve always been a student of ancient Japanese culture, and collector of their objet d; art; (AND NO. I do not own one Katana or 'Samurai-sword) . A girl I was seeing via internet persuaded me to try to write some poetry, so I tried.
The results are posted on this site.
What I wanted was more opinion, Honest critisism. Where it should be improved etc?
All I got was a rant entitled 'CURB YOUR BLOOD LUSt' a member I wont name here, who had obviously misunderstood the entire poem's meaning!
Or have I written it so badly that it reads as a call to arms of some sort?
PLEASE; If you have the time to read my work 'Rememberance Day', I would love to hear your thoughts, and honest opinions on wgere I went wrong. Thank You. Gary Drake.
Suman Kumar Das
(2/23/2014 8:27:00 AM)
My respected bards,
I am happy to back to this wonderful e-plat form after few days. I cordially invite you all to read my new writes 'Bereft Beggar' & 'Sprouting Seed'. Look forward to receiving your guidance for my future works.
Suman Kumar Das
(2/20/2014 7:41:00 PM)
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Petaluma Police Car Tires
Parked at the curb,
The Petaluma Police could not observe,
The car their sarge had parked;
Not very far,
I found me that car,
And quickly thereto embarked;
While I approached the police cruiser,
I viewed the 'soon to be' accuser,
Yet continued on with my plan;
Two tires were popped,
As downward they dropped,
I fled in my sedan;
A laughing desire,
Brought a slash to each tire,
Done in full brightness of the day;
There I lurked,
Around the corner the cops worked,
And with them came my chance to play;
From each tire's quick blow,
Came the thrill hearing the air let flow,
And to the ground them rims did go;
By the knife's quick swing,
Came laughter from the hiss sound of air leaking,
While leaving the surprise of needing a tow;
No, 'Candid Camera' wasn't there,
To capture the officer's expression or glare,
When he viewed the car he left so careless;
Did he first move his car,
To discover that he couldn't drive far?,
Did he hear the hiss or were they flat and airless?
Oh, what a dare,
For me to hear that gush sound of air.
Then escape, without being caught;
But with a short quiz,
The accuser said, 'I know who it is! ',
Well, my sedan, the police then sought;
My laughter was hard,
While I headed for my yard,
Though trouble was coming my way;
All patrol units looked about,
To search me out,
For the trouble that I now must pay,
While homeward I scoot,
Came a Sonoma County sheriff's deputy in pursuit,
Riding his cruiser close to my rear;
Bright red lights flashed on,
The fun was gone,
But still, I had no fear;
The joy it brought,
Was lost when caught,
And the laughter vanished away;
Very few people knew,
About the other police tires I blew,
And now just caught this day;
Stopped outside my home gate,
Came red lights to wait,
The identification of who they caught;
Patrol units swarmed about,
It was me, they had no doubt,
They've captured who they sought;
Police car hysteria,
Was swarming the area,
Oh, it was boiling hot;
Like a beehive ready,
With a sting so steady,
A large police force quickly was brought;
'Put cuffs on them hands..'
As the police sergeant commands,
'...then take 'em in for lockup...'
With two flats on the cruiser,
The joke was a doozer,
As the number of times, years over, buildup;
I was brought before a judge,
But really...I had no grudge,
Gave forty dollars to the bondsman to bail;
As the jail door opened wide,
Quickly, I dashed outside,
Now released from the Sonoma County Jail;
I appeared in court again and again,
But a plea bargain made that end,
And no more jail time had I to pay;
Made unhappy, I was,
But that could be because,
'Pay for two tires and don't do it again', heard I, the court say;
Other police agencies know,
Twenty-eight of their tires went low,
The Cotati police headquarters suffered the worst;
Well, with two tires to buy,
My score remains still very high,
Considering the others I prior had burst;
If it ever happens again.
It won't be me, though I'll still grin,
I've retired, finally, from this crime;
The memory I still bare,
The laughter, its thrill and dare;
And the story turned now into rhyme
Tony Avila Sampson
Tawfeeq Hasan Khan
(2/13/2014 5:43:00 AM)
Can I have a rhyming words e-book for free.
(1/27/2014 3:10:00 PM)
Hi, my name is Austin and i am a new poet here.if this is a rhythm and rhyme workshop i urge everyone to view and comment on my new poem titled crossroads.Thanks and you wont be dissapointed.
Thomas Vaughan Jones
(1/22/2014 8:30:00 AM)
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Probably the most important aspect of rhyming poetry is not neccessarily the rhyme itself. Forced rhyme, ie. finding words to end a line purely for the sake of a rhyme is an abomination. Rather we should find the correct syllables and meter to make the line read smoothly. Then we match the lines to complement each other, so that they follow one another with ease. If the poem is to have a correct meter, the meter should be a constant, unless there is good reason to " change step"
The recommended meter is the IAMB, which sounds very like normal speech. In other words the emphasis should be De DAH De DAH De DAH
Iambic pentameter is the name given to a line of verse that consists of five iambs (an iamb being one unstressed syllable followed by one stressed, such as " before" ;) . It has been a fundamental building block of poetry in English, used in many poems by many poets from the English Renaissance to the present day.
Having established the rhythm, the rhyme can be addressed as a separate issue. Beware of repeating rhyming words ad nauseum. First find a rhyme scheme. The most common is usually A. B. A. B. As an example, here's a sonnet I'm working on.
Once Sonnet Fever takes you to her bed...................A
your every thought becomes expressed in rhyme......B
You're in her grasp and cannot break the thread........A
which binds you to a mellow metered time.................B
If you intend to try these suggestions out and you find it difficult to find the rhyme then omit the rhyme on Ls 1 and 3 and concentrate on Ls 2 and 4.
Once you find a rhyme scheme, stick with it throughout your poem. Good Luck, and I'm always happy to help if you need me.Replies for this message:
(1/19/2014 12:31:00 PM)
discuss the matter
which is better
breaking this line
made me fine