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  • Rookie - 164 Points Hugh Everard (2/22/2015 4:09:00 AM) Post reply
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    Mankind did fret from an alien threat it's armies were in full retreat.
    Who could be found to retake the ground why! that's Willis it's right up his street.
    He gave his girlfriend a peck saying l won't be a sec the whole thing sounds a bit naff
    But he soon lost his grin when his dear wife walked in and the aliens had the last laugh

  • Rookie - 164 Points Hugh Everard (2/22/2015 3:20:00 AM) Post reply

    Remember Whilst Jesus may have said come forth
    The taxman always comes first

  • Gold Star - 7,881 Points Ronjoy Brahma (2/17/2015 4:16:00 AM) Post reply

    Interesting

  • Rookie - 129 Points Alexander Johnson (12/24/2014 7:28:00 AM) Post reply

    Some people say I am the best at swearing,
    With pointy, poky emphasis, on the syllables I'm airing,
    With the '..at', and the '..it' and the '..ick' and the '..uck'
    Sometimes all that comes out out of my mouth is just muck....
    Pronouncing the words, I take pride in my 'slang',
    I can swear better, than any youth gang!
    I think I've must have the right shaped gob,
    For the finest expletives, I'm just the job...

  • Rookie - 164 Points Hugh Everard (12/24/2014 1:01:00 AM) Post reply

    A man l know was always itching to get on with life that's why he always started from scratch

  • Rookie - 129 Points Alexander Johnson (12/18/2014 10:02:00 AM) Post reply

    'Miiiiiiiiiiiims! ! ! ! '
    'Miiiiiiiiiiiims! ! ! ! '
    'How you do! ! ! '
    'U OK! ! ! '
    'Want some water???'
    'Want some Bickeeees! ! ! '
    Just Listen to me, what the hell am I on?
    I sound like one of the BeeGees, with his balls being stepped on! ! !
    I dont even like cats, I want a dog for a pet! ! !
    but my mrs keeps on saying, 'we cannot get one yet'.
    But I do like Mims, she is my cat, and I Love her silly face,
    I just wish she was called rover and she had a ball to chase.
    So if you ever walk by a house and you hear a stupid high pitch tone,
    Saying 'Miiiiiiims' and 'Moooos' and 'Bickeeees', Its probably my home.

  • Rookie - 164 Points Hugh Everard (12/7/2014 12:16:00 PM) Post reply

    Olld Windy
    He rode out of the west, his gun was the best but there wasn't one notch on his colt
    You see, he ate beans in the night and if the wind was just right his rivals knew just when to bolt

  • Rookie - 164 Points Hugh Everard (12/6/2014 3:26:00 AM) Post reply

    Effects
    Because he was ill he kept taking his pill thinking that would be that
    Now l could not swear what the side effects were
    But there was always a place for his hat

  • Rookie - 164 Points Hugh Everard (12/5/2014 2:04:00 PM) Post reply

    Too much Viagra
    His excitement could never be hid
    He thanked the lord for that which he did
    On the day he was buried by four men he was carried
    In a box with a hole in the lid

  • Rookie - 91 Points Cole Severns (11/14/2014 10:25:00 PM) Post reply

    A man doesn't automatically get my respect. He has to get down in the dirt and beg for it. -Jack Handey

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