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Niken Kusuma Wardani

(17 February 1976 / Jakarta)

Between He & Me and You & I


There was always he or
Me who always there

He would die, he said
I stared at his empty space
I never felt his breath, does he exist?
He comes everyday
Handed me colorful dream called hopes
Yet he hurt me in every chance
Carving the lies depth – security so he said
The life of he & me is a spark of mistake
When emotion level up the theory
We prefer to denied and stay blind
Wouldn’t be any option to claim
It’s indeed originate loneliness
Suffocated the mind to take a step each time
Closer, deeper, tight but light
It gives away when he persist
It gives in when me at stake

He would be real, he commit
I overwhelmed by his old ignorance
I never heard his sorry, does he remain?
He tossed the fate daily
Eased the harsh fact of hatred
Yet he care not to mind at all
No pain no gain – that’s life he said
The bound of me & he is an immense crap
When wish exceed the fantasy
We ignored to recall the limit
Wouldn’t we choose to forsake
It’s a blissed of fake excitement
Intrigued by our selfish demeanor to posses
Intense, more, demanding but intermittent
It breaks free when he left
It breaks up when me away

He’s too close – he evolved into you
Me then will be consider into I

You open the day and smile to the sun
The sweet ray vivid within reach
I start to greet the day with wonder
What made your speak louder
Shall I captured you when briskly left
Should I contemplate you and run?
Now that all crack deliver blinding light
The truth merges with my pain
The hurt from your bitter deception
The wound of being the willing victim
Where was I standing? Who was I holding?
You only almost there when I keep hovering
One told me to fly and follow the air
Should I met you, wasted no words
But it takes double life time
When I haven’t finish one

I am on a journey to the soul-quest
Dragging long memory and a handful fact
Waiting patiently as your figure lured
Your eyes piercing, my mind gasping for air
I should take a picture of your first sight
But it’s me the wrong item in the scene
How I eager to melt in your big-bear warm hug
Hear sweet lullaby from the beat of your heart
Your faint smile addressed another story
There stand tall as a perfect art
Reaching innocently spreading the charm
So I understand, there were never us
My world scattered, slashed and scramble
My life revolved around you, how would it be then?
Your bitter smile said it's done, removing our existence
Your life fading but not him, memory will keep him alive

Submitted: Monday, May 06, 2013
Edited: Tuesday, May 07, 2013

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end of April 2013

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