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Of Muses

(7 march 1988)

For All Broken Things


It was the first time my heart was beating that fast, because of a kiss.

But you didn't realise it,
that it was my first kiss.

I think of myself sometimes, with pity, because of that.
I think of how i was
and I can't belive it.

A whole in my chest, no heart.
In my hand, a pen,
awakens the pages filled with ink.
Pushed around by the wind
most of them only touch the sky
in their attempt to reach the stars.
It makes a nice image though,
this ended love.

I just couldn't stop it alone
that's why I used the poems.
Falling in love after a single kiss,
did it make me look like a fool in your eyes?

-.-.-.-.-.-

Yea, I skipped crying.

Frankly I had no idea how to cry
I never cried
I went on with my life, I went on forward
I looked towards the stars instead of looking in her eyes again.
I never looked back.
I stopped wondering about what might have been
if I had not been poor and skinny.
And something changed inside me, something important.
I stopped feeling sorry for those girls
that run after macho guys.
I stopped being a wimp also.
I went to the gym, I learned how to fight,
because I wanted to beat the crap out of everybody.
And then I learned like an obsessed freak.
It was worth it.
I became exceptional.
I made money. A lot of money.
But it's still not nearly enough.
I still hate her.
That's what hardens me
that's what moves my heart
out of the stinking garbage
of a broken heart.

I never forgot what I told myself
that day
when I stopped looking for her footsteps.

So, I'm gonna tell it to you too
to make you strong, to make you a beast.

'How can someone like you, cry for someone like her?
You can be so much more than what you are now.
Don't get your feet tangled in memories like a fool,
clench your fists and take it like a man.'

Submitted: Wednesday, June 19, 2013
Edited: Thursday, June 20, 2013

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