Nakia Crespin

Rookie (07-09-1987 / Denver, Colorado)

I still can't let you go


As I sit here I think about all the time I wasted on you,
As I sit here I think about how bad my heart hurts and how it seems to be getting worse each day,
As I sit here and think about you I am drawn into a trance, so deep I can't even feel the tears falling down my face,
As I sit here I remember when you used to caress my face and tell me how much I meant to you,
Then leave for days at a time, all jsut to find out you were with someone else doing the same for her,
When you needed a shoulder to cry on i was there, and when you were down and out, I picked you up and dusted you off,
And when i would just want to sit home and love on you, you always found an excuse not to,
You did to me, exactly what that whore did to you,
And it seems you are still not satisfied with all the pain you've put me through,
When I neede a shoulder to cry on you told me to get over it, when I was down and out you smiled and walked away,
When I found out I was carrying your child,
You felt the need to strike me,
And when you almost killed us both (your son and me) ,
And I could barely walk or talk, you felt the need to spit in my face and through me to the ground,
And now after all you've done, your ready to be a family,
After I almost lost our son cause of you, you want to be a family?
How can you expect such grace from me?
You killed my spirit, You've torn my heart, you've turned everything good in me and f***** it all up,
Now you want forgiveness, you all of a sudden love me after all was said and done?
Not once did you stop to say you were sorry, not once did you ever take you were sorry,
Not once did you take responsibility for your son,
Now all of a sudden we are your family and he's all yo can think about?
Wow I knew jail changes people, but i didn't know 7 months of it could change a lifestyle,
I guess when you have nothing you realize all you had,
I still can't let you go and then i realize this pain will never go away.

Submitted: Sunday, April 06, 2008

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