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A Battered Woman's Life

Today I am good I love my life My husband now who is loving and strong. has fought some of my battle with me, he just don't know the extent of each part he has played.
Tomorrow could be good, or go a completely different way. I never can tell just whats going to trigger it and make those bad feelings start up in my stomach. But I need to remember my husband now is not the boy i was with then.
I wish you could see the hell in my head and the way my heart feels when all those bad memories start flooding in.
I don't mean too argue or cause those fights, or make you feel in any way that i don't love you.Because my god how i really do.
but the life of a battered woman is no different then that of a soldier. we both have fought battles and lived through our own hell.
and those of us who made it out alive still have all the bad memories to try and forget.
but no matter how long ago, or how bad it was. those nightmares in our memories still come out every now and then. for some it's seldom, but for most to often.
no matter how few or far between, they still cause side effects, the likes that you've never seen.
so until you have been beaten, and choked, and almost killed. please don't pretend to know the way i feel.or tell me that i have had plenty time to heal. please just hug me if sometimes i cry. or you see me start to shake.
offer me a shoulder or an ear.
do not belittle me or tell me i'm wrong.
don't ever act like i was the one who was wrong. for it's not our faults that some men choose to beat us, and treat us like trash. and its certainly not our fault that they made us feel like without them we wouldnt last, be wanted or loved.
please just remember every now and then i might need extra love
signed a battered woman

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