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I know it was hard for you,
having a child like me,
there was always something wrong with her,
that child with a disability,
You always had to care for her,
it took up to much of your time,
You shouldn't have had to do that,
that child was out of her mind,
But all the hell you put me threw,
you should be ashamed,
all your anger and problems on me you blamed,
All I wanted from you,
was to be loved and accepted,
But instead I was an awful burden,
that you rejected,
Many nights I sit alone and cry,
because all that shit you said about loving me,
was a lye,
Ruining your marriage,
you said I was to blame,
And because of my imperfections,
things would never be the same,
I always tried to please you,
do everything your way,
But you lost faith in me,
and told me to move away,
You said you would always be there for me,
I was your little girl,
But I guess that wasn't true,
because you won't talk to me anymore,
I know I was born without sight,
And my mental state was far from right,
Don't talk don't feel don't trust you'd say,
And tell everyone that your homelife is more than okay,
And even if what happens in our house is vary wrong,
Put on a smile stand tall and be strong,
I couldn't pretend that the insanity wasn't there,
It isn't easy when your parents don't even care,
, The shit you put me threw,
It really wasn't fair,
But I guess that's a reality, that I'll just have to bare,
Your screaming and yelling and crying at night,
You and Mike were always having some kind of a fight,
I'd sit in my room and listen and weep,
Preying that my siblings were still asleep,
Then I'd cut deep with my blade,
Gashing repetitively till my guilt would fade,
I'd sit on the floor,
and let myself bleed,
And for a moment I was freed,
But relief would last for only a spell,
And when it was over I was back to my hell,
I delt with your problems,
in my own special way,
The blade would get me,
threw another day,
I took care of my brothers and sisters,
even though it was tough,
But as far as you were concerned I never did enough,
I loved going to school,
It was a safe place,
Sometimes I could even put on a happy face,
I dreaded going home,
because things were so bad,
I always felt lonely afraid and sad,
Now I'm separated from my siblings,
And I feel so alone,
I barely get to talk to them,
Not even on the phone,
I saw little Michael the other day,
he held my hand and cried,
begging me to stay,
But I new I couldn't,
there was just no way!
I'm angry at you,
for all that you've done,
Whenever there were problems,
you'd just turn and run,
You wouldn't admit,
that some things were your fault,
Why can't you act,
like a mature adult?
You only care about yourself,
That is unbelievably sad,
But if you opened your eyes,
You'd see it hurts me so bad,
Your view is so distorted,
You are so immature,
Just like a little two year old,
Of that I'm vary sure,
You've always said,
That my problems weren't real,
You are just too selfish,
What the hell is the deal?
We're a happy family,
Sometimes it seems,
But when I awake,
It was only in my dreams,
You hate your husband,
You've told me everything,
So why the hell do you,
Wear that wedding ring?
You guys are always fighting,
About one thing or another,
You're both to narcissistic,
To care about each other,
I'm almost ready,
My stuff I will pack,
And once I leave,
I'll never come back,
I know this is hard,
For you to believe,
But acceptance from you,
Was imposible to achieve,
You never thought,
I'd cut my strings,
But now I am free,
To spread my wings.
Ashley Seymour
| Submitted Date |
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Friday, September 15, 2006 |
| Submitted Date |
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Wednesday, September 15, 2010 |
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Poets
