Sheena Blackhall Poems

What did the Chinese give to the world?
Abacus, bells and brandy
The calendar, compass, crossbow
Fireworks…the world's first whisky
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At the Conference of Scottish inventions
Dolly the sheep arrived, with hair new permed, blue rinsed

Ten Adhesive stamps were licking the boots
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Albanian dogs go ham ham ham
Catalan dogs go bup
Chinese dogs go wang wang wang
They learn it as a pup
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Feast your eyes on space, my friends
To Daveclark, Bonk and Tea
To Honda and Humptydumpty
Wanke and Seanconnery
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Marmaris, an all inclusive package
A western Shangri-La
Friendly staff, nothing is too much trouble
Cheap, clean, rooms, mirrors & marble gleaming
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My aunt was like a tumbled sheaf of corn
Her hair was fair as ripened, rippling grain
Her speech was gentle as the summer rain
She loved all beasts, but dearest, those new born
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Fit kinda cheil wis Rabbie Burns?
They speired in the kintra skweel
'He wis a fermer an a poet
Soul bared, wi nocht concealed.'
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The lavatory attendant rolls her eyes
At filthy Westerners who wipe with paper
The Asian drains can't cope with such excess
Each sanitary sheet, thin as a wafer's
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We Scots are a free reenge breed
See the diaspora? Like thrissle seeds in a gale
We're aawye, ony wee crack or neuk'll dae
Fur us tae sattle, trailin oor reets
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In a soaring penthouse in Rio De Janeiro
Five minutes from Ipanema-Leblon beach
Michelle Springer, sports commentator
Having just finished a crab burger
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