Spike Milligan Poems

Elephants are contagious!
Be careful how you tread.
An Elephant that's been trodden on
Should be confined to bed!
...

I must go down to the sea again,
to the lonely sea and the sky;
I left my shoes and socks there -
I wonder if they're dry?
...

I cannot
and I will not
No, I cannot love you less
Like the flower to the butterfly
...

If I could write words
Like leaves on an autumn forest floor,
What a bonfire my letters would make.
...

What happened to the boy I was?
Why did he run away?
And leave me old and thinking, like
There'd been no yesterday?
...

Go away girl, go away
and let me pack my dreams
Now where did I put those yesteryears
made up with broken seams
...

American Detectives
Never remove their hats
When investigating murders
In other people's flats.
...

Young are our dead
Like babies they lie
The wombs they blest once
Not healed dry
...

Unaware of my crime
they stood me in the dock.

I was sentenced to life....
...

The people who live
On the Oojah-ka-Piv
Stand around in bundles of nine
...